Killoggs : Eats at Waffle House

"If I had a million dollars? I'd do two chicks at the same time." - Lawrence from Office Space

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jake

Killoggs: Known to be useful;

Believed to be beautiful!

#include
using namespace std;
int main()
{
cout << "Hello Killoggs From

\n";
}

I thought I'd introduce myself through a poll...
I have the biggest crush of all on this website,
and I talked with Ben last week about how, with killoggs,
we almost never check any other webcontent at all,
and so I wondered:

How do you use your killoggs today?

[ 55 responses ] < Introduction > < link >

[ posted by jake at 07/27/2004 03:28:21 PM ]
[ trackback ]

Threaded Responses [ bottom ]

jake [email] said at 3:39 PM 07-27-2004:
As a for instance, just this week we've got
1. Apartment offers
2. Crashpad seeking
3. Work complaints
4. Masturbatory polls
5. Poetry book plugs...

[Reply To this] [#120308]

art said at 3:47 PM 07-27-2004:
Wait till you get the Mastubatory plugs...

[Reply To this] [#120322] [ip: logged]

jake [email] said at 3:52 PM 07-27-2004:
but masturbation is done to keep it unplugged...

[Reply To this] [#120331]

jeremy [email] said at 3:48 PM 07-27-2004:
printf is where it's at.

[Reply To this] [#120324]

jake [email] said at 3:50 PM 07-27-2004:
you said it--but the cout is from the first page I found, and I strive for consistency

[Reply To this] [#120327]

cricket [email] said at 3:51 PM 07-27-2004:
i like your picture, jake. you look really cute!
p.s. i hear you are the best camp director ever.
p.p.s.
is there other web content?

[Reply To this] [#120330]

jake [email] said at 3:57 PM 07-27-2004:
aww shucks Cricket, now I'm blushing.
PS: As a director, I don't think I've got Andy Spear beat yet, but he brought me in to this business, so I guess it's okay that he could still take me out.
PPS: As far as I know, it's just killoggs, kazaa, and thousands of crappy pages with pink letters put up by computer campers...

[Reply To this] [#120334]

jake [email] said at 4:04 PM 07-27-2004:
PPPS: For anyone keeping score, summer camp is how I came to killoggs, and Andy Spear is how I came to camp. So that's how I met Ben, Josh, Cricket, Mark, and Seth...also the infamous John Bennion...

[Reply To this] [#120339]

Woody said at 4:09 PM 07-27-2004:
So your response is, you use Killoggs to meet boys?

[Reply To this] [#120341] [ip: logged]

Michael Jackson said at 4:15 PM 07-27-2004:
Worked for me!

ooooo - with a name like Woody, you sound like you would enjoy sleeping over? Are you younger than 15?

[Reply To this] [#120343] [ip: logged]

josh [email] said at 4:17 PM 07-27-2004:
Cricket knew Jake before there was a Killoggs.

[Reply To this] [#120344]

jake [email] said at 4:24 PM 07-27-2004:
I guess that goes for you too, right?
Did you ever find Jason Todd again?

[Reply To this] [#120351]

zack [email] said at 8:42 PM 07-27-2004:
he was killed by the joker a while back.

[Reply To this] [#120429]

jake [email] said at 8:46 PM 07-27-2004:
Yeah but he's totally back like every time Batman gets a dose of scarecrow fear gas...

John Todd, on the other hand, remains missing?

[Reply To this] [#120434]

jake [email] said at 1:47 AM 08-02-2007:
And somehow, someway, he's back...

[Reply To this] [#252079]

cecil [email] said at 4:00 PM 07-27-2004:
I expelled some dumb jokes from my brain so I don't embarrass myself with them in front of actual people.

I guess that counts as masturbation too.

[Reply To this] [#120336]

art said at 4:01 PM 07-27-2004:
punnerbation

[Reply To this] [#120337] [ip: logged]

jake [email] said at 4:08 PM 07-27-2004:
speaking of:
plugs
expelled things from the head
masturbation...

Do you have a widow's peak, Cecil?
Your head makes it look like you do,
but in photos it doesn't seem that way...
Last night I dreamt that mine had crept all the way to the back of my scalp...

[Reply To this] [#120340]

cecil [email] said at 4:29 PM 07-27-2004:
that picture of me in ben's glasses in the Comicon '04 post is a pretty accurate documentation of my hairline. I'm 33 so it's been changing shape lately.

I don't know if it's a classic widow's peak. It's more of a wife-of-MIA's peak or still legally married to a deadbeat dad's peak.

[Reply To this] [#120356]

jake [email] said at 4:38 PM 07-27-2004:
Riiigggghhht.
You barely have any recession at all, man. You've got 8 years on me, but my forelock is a lonely island as my temples get broader and taller and longer...
Your head looks much more like the halloween photo--with the bullet wound?

[Reply To this] [#120366]

julie [email] said at 4:42 PM 07-27-2004:
head: afroless
pic: afroed out

[Reply To this] [#120369]

cecil [email] said at 4:59 PM 07-27-2004:
I was afroed you were going to point that out.

At some point I may post a well-lit headshot of the wild nest that has become my do.

[Reply To this] [#120377]

ed [email] said at 8:01 PM 07-27-2004:
Wild wild nest!

[Reply To this] [#120419]

julie [email] said at 10:55 PM 07-27-2004:
you slay me.

[Reply To this] [#120475]

cecil [email] said at 5:02 PM 07-27-2004:
yeah, I'm not complaining. I have a lot of hair. It's moved back about 1/2 an inch in the last year.

[Reply To this] [#120378]

abby [email] said at 4:41 PM 07-27-2004:
receding hairlines are so wonderful

[Reply To this] [#120368]

art said at 4:46 PM 07-27-2004:
bless you, abby. bless you

[Reply To this] [#120372] [ip: logged]

ed [email] said at 8:02 PM 07-27-2004:
AMEN!

[Reply To this] [#120420]

zack [email] said at 8:43 PM 07-27-2004:
hahah so abby like chubby, balding dudes. You are the QUEEN OF THE INTERNET, abby!

[Reply To this] [#120430]

abby [email] said at 11:05 PM 07-27-2004:
when you say it, it sounds kindof groady

[Reply To this] [#120478]

zack [email] said at 11:51 PM 07-27-2004:
hahah

[Reply To this] [#120482]

john [email] said at 4:20 PM 07-27-2004:
//Introduction.cpp
#include
using namespace std;
int main()
{
char mood;
cout cin>>mood;
cout " today."
return 0;
}

[Reply To this] [#120345]

john [email] said at 4:21 PM 07-27-2004:
Whoa! That totally left out half of what I typed! What's the deal Josh?

[Reply To this] [#120347]

josh [email] said at 4:22 PM 07-27-2004:
if you use the brackets, browsers assume you are using HTML tags. HTML tags don't show up.

[Reply To this] [#120348]

Woody said at 4:45 PM 07-27-2004:
Can you excape the brackets somehow?

[Reply To this] [#120371] [ip: logged]

josh [email] said at 4:52 PM 07-27-2004:
you can use HTMLentities.

[Reply To this] [#120375]

Woody said at 8:44 PM 07-27-2004:
<testing> Ok nerdboy, I figured out it's a PHP function. I don't know how that helps, I can't execute code through the comments. Oh hell, I'm just gonna try something. </testing>

[Reply To this] [#120433] [ip: logged]

Woody said at 8:47 PM 07-27-2004:
Fook yeah.

[Reply To this] [#120435] [ip: logged]

jake [email] said at 4:33 PM 07-27-2004:
Many uses of the might of killoggs are now codified in the categories...
But you can also use killoggs to:
6. Give a shout out to long lost friends
7. Get rid of event tickets
8. Document your delightfully tawdry escapades with naked housecleaning boys
9. Cry into your keyboard about a painful break-up
10. outgeek the geekiest.
And more!

[Reply To this] [#120361]

abby [email] said at 4:57 PM 07-27-2004:
there is NO CRYING in killoggs, jake

[Reply To this] [#120376]

jake [email] said at 5:07 PM 07-27-2004:
yet if you prick killoggs, doth it not bleed?
and is this not a wet hanky before me?

[Reply To this] [#120381]

reggie [email] said at 7:53 PM 07-27-2004:
Killoggs is only laughing on the outside
Our smile is just skin deep
If you could see inside we're really crying
You might join us for a weep.

[Reply To this] [#120417]

Woody said at 8:38 PM 07-27-2004:
Those aren't tears...

[Reply To this] [#120428] [ip: logged]

jake [email] said at 8:44 PM 07-27-2004:
D
Di
Diiii

(wait for it)

DICK SNOT!
)
8===o ~o ~~o ~~~o

[Reply To this] [#120432]

brandon [email] said at 9:32 AM 08-02-2007:
LEECH DICK.
Or
EBOLA BALLS
8==&===>

[Reply To this] [#252087]

zack [email] said at 8:43 PM 07-27-2004:
don't tell Ed that.

[Reply To this] [#120431]

jake [email] said at 8:47 PM 07-27-2004:
Ed reads everything on Killoggs.
He's like my high school yearbook teacher during july.

[Reply To this] [#120436]

ed [email] said at 9:07 PM 07-27-2004:
My hi-skool journalism teacher used to stand just inside the darkroom door and masturbate while looking at the hi-skool hotties. Oh, dear Lord, I hope he was looking at girls, because suddenly, I'm even more frightened than I was at the time.

Man, I wish I could be as cool as he was.

(And yes, that is a true story. They suddenly changed journalism teaschers between my junior and senior years. And I was one of those who were permenantly scarred by walking in on this scene)

[Reply To this] [#120444]

jake [email] said at 9:30 PM 07-27-2004:
given the goings on by students inside my high school darkroom, that guy could have gotten away with just hiding in the back corner...

[Reply To this] [#120455]

ed [email] said at 8:59 PM 07-27-2004:
There is crying in life.

Killoggs is life.

[Reply To this] [#120441]

jake [email] said at 8:36 PM 07-27-2004:
11. Rediscover the reason for the gender wars.

And the rest of these should have links too, but I'm lazy and the news search is broke:
12. Rediscover the reason for the race wars
13. Rediscover the reason for the class wars
14. Rediscover the art of the Secret Wars
15. Relive the confusion of the Brandon wars

[Reply To this] [#120427]