Here's what I know about Denver:

It's up there with Dakota for names you ought not name your childrens
The last dinosaur resided there in the 80s
It's uncomfortably close to Colorado Springs
I couldn't give a shit about their professional football/basketball/rapeball franchises
Boat Drinks?
It's possible to charter a creationist tour of their natural history museum
It's...on a plateau, maybe?
It's expensive to fly in and out
I'm going to be driving a large rental truck and towing a vehicle there in about 3 weeks
I know one person, an ex, who lives there, and all she knows is books and school
The Alferd Packer Memorial Grill is not there

Oh, yeah, John Elway - I'm waving my hands.

So here's the interactive part? Who's been to Denver? Who's lived there? What do you do in Denver? The meetup.com Denver people are super-nice, but, they really haven't told me anything, useful. So, what the fuck kinds of things are there to do in Denver when you're there? What's not to miss. What ought I skip? Help me enjoy Denver, because I really want to, I just, I just don't know if I can, yet.