So I sorta freaked out just now because someone was shining a light under my back stairwell door. This weirded me out since no one really should be back there, so I leaned out and saw a bunch of cops.

I went downstairs and noted that it was 7-8 Baltimore County Sheriffs. I wondered what the fuck they were doing here since this isn't the county. They are searching the courtyard, our building, the other out buildings... So I come to find that my neighbor apparently has an autistic young kid (which I've never seen) and the kid is missing, and it apparently wasn't missing before they came looking for her boyfriend, who lives with her.

More as it comes, they are still milling about. Now there are tons of sirens.

I haven't written or been on here a lot recently, mainly because I'm distracted with the large amount of nothing I do. I can talk and talk and talk about this subject but its all with my friends who are pretty much born and raised in this area and I need some advice from the worldy people on here.

I need to move soon, out of DC. I'm so done with DC and I need to actually start my life - wherever I move now is going to be the start of everything. It's where I'll be studying more how to sew and networking and socializing until I am blue in the face and where I will be starting my business/store. Wherever I go is completely paving the way for my career and it's scary that a decision like this is impacting quite a bit. I also tend to put a lot of pressure on myself.

New York was always where I wanted to go, mainly because I love how big it is and how fashion focused it is.. but it is SO saturated with people like me and stores like mine will be that it seems like it'd be competing with so many people, half of whom have the upper hand allready because theyre from New York and born into money that can help them support a small store.

So where did that leave me... I need a big but inexpensive city that has a market for a store like mine and can support me. So Chicago? I've never been to Chicago but it's been talked about a lot recently and everyones talk has kind of hyped me up. Anthony and I are going there the first week of August so I guess I'll see then. But right now, Chicago seems to be my first choice except I REALLY cannot take cold weather. Really.

Also, San Francisco - it's just a city I always have loved and now Carla is there.. and honestly I was never too impressed with their shopping - but jeez I'll forever be in debt.

People, tell me your experiences - with running a business, with these cities, with everything. I'm confused.

My brain picked tonight, a night when the migraines are really leaning hard, a night when this kind of thing is really inopportune to repeat Cher's classic ballad

"If I Could Turn Back Time"

I thought I'd pass on the love:

I dont know why I did the things I did
I dont know why I said the things I said
Prides like a knife, it can cut deep inside
Words are like weapons, they wound sometimes
I didnt really mean to hurt you
I didnt wanna see you go
I know I made you cry
But baby

Chorus
If I could turn back time (I'd drag a fork through my Wernicke's area)
If I could find a way (To get this out of my head)
Id take back those words that have hurt you
And youd stay
If I could reach the stars
Id give them all to you
Then youd love me, love me
Like you used to do
If I could turn back

My world was shattered, I was torn apart
Like somebody took a knife
And drove it deep in my heart
When you walked out that door
I swore that I didnt care
But I lost every thing darling then and there
Too strong to tell you I was sorry
Too proud to tell you I was wrong
I know that I was blind, and darling

There. My biological drive to spread misery around is fulfilled.