Inspired by an LC convo.

My top five favorite movies from early childhood in no particular order:

- The Secret of Nimh
- The Never Ending Story
- Flight of the Navigator
- My Little Ponies the Movie
- The Black Stallion

I can't help it. I'm probably just a mean person, but at least I'm an honestly mean person. It gets worse when I'm around my friends and we're out in public. Shit just rolls out of my mouth and I can't help it. At a bar last night there was a girl dressed from head to toe in brown. She had an ugly bandana wrapped around her forehead that continued down her back the length of her body, a matching Stevie Knicks "flow" skirt and knee high moccasins. Come on dude! She was askin' for it like a slut in a mini skirt. When a friend of mine saw her she just busted out laughing and said "woah!!!". I began calling her "Dances with Wolves". Kara made me pee my pants by calling her "Pocahontasshole". The whole night I could have stopped drinking and just cheered myself up by glancing over at her swaying through the crowd like she was doing a rain dance in the forrest. Kara made a joke that we better not encourage her or the sprinklers might go off. At least she's funny about it. I'm just down right mean. It's not even low self esteem, I have tons that people can make fun of me for. Bad tattoos, snaggle teeth, etc etc .....and thats totally cool. I encourage it. That way maybe I won't feel so bad when I spit it back out at them. I constantly tell myself that I'm going to stop being so mean, but then I walk out my door and it starts fresh again.
So last night I came to the conclusion that maybe I don't hate it so much, and maybe thats just a part of me, like a birthmark I was born with or something. Maybe if I felt so bad about it or thought it was a nasty enough habit, I'd have fixed it by now. So I guess the final question I'm trying to ask is, does that make me officially a frigid, wretched horrible person?
Wait, don't answer that, I don't really care.

Mom: :-(I can't save everything! Not enough room in the car!
Meredith: I am sorry momza
Meredith: put some things in the bathtubs
Mom: so many precious things
Mom: I am staking in the laundry room in plastic
Mom: trying to get all the photos with me
Meredith: and put the couch cushions on top of them
Mom: that won't help if the roof comes off
Mom: I am very afraid of this storm
Mom: anyway, I have had my tantrum, I will now go back to work
Meredith: are you taking both cars?
Mom: no, I don't think so
Mom: just one
Meredith: Jeremy says come up here
Mom: too late
Meredith: Jeremy says he would come and save the Corvette, but he is too tall
Mom: we are putting it on blocks
Mom: our garage ended up being the safest place we could get it to
Mom: the pictures are more important to me though
Mom: and letters & such
Mom: the corvette is insured
Mom: my car is also
Mom: I could use a stiff drink at the moment
Mom: very stiff
Mom: perhaps a straight shot
Mom: I'll be back later
Meredith: poor momza
Meredith: okay

A picture's worth a thousand words.



The proliferation of ? heads is confusing to the tiny-brained masses. PUH-LEEZ, draw some heads for the punctuationpeople!

I am so bored waiting for this stupid hurricane. I bought a bunch of alcohol thinking people would want to come over and party, but the traffic is keeping everyone either at home or in traffic.
I just got back from riding my bike around with a Supergirl shirt on. I rode by this kid who shouted "Supergirl! We're gonna get bombed!!!
I would love to loot but I don't think I can get away with that yet.
Any other ideas?

-- said some West Banky guy standing next to Blanco who works for some sort of emergency preparation group. They practically had to shush an off-camera Benson to stop mumbling prayers for rain and FEMA money to build a new stadium for what continues to be one of the worst and non-lucrative teams in the NFL - (not that that matters, has anyone read else read Mark Rosentraub's "Major League Losers?") (OK, Benson wasn't actually there, but I'm sure wherever he is, he's scheming in some way) New Orleans has to be really boring right now, because everyone left - I saw them on T.V.

ANYWAY, Let's go to New Orleans:

• It's got to be really cheap, we could probably stay at the Columns for like, 30 bucks


• There are probably all sorts of stupid drink specials, like, all you can drink Hurricanes and Until the Levee Breaks all Well Drinks for a Dollar


• I bet we could beat the shit out of all those Mod fags and their pretty Vespas, and dump their bodies in swollen Bayou Lafourche


• I could throw up on Bourbon, outside of Temptations without splashing any tourists because all the tourists are gone


• New Orleans may not be there after Thursday


• There is absolutely no traffic on I-10 going into town, none


• Plus, the dude I was going to hang out tonight is out with this chick that I stopped going out with because (1) I thought I might be gay (I wasn't, I'm just really bad with girls) (2) 10 years later, she pretty much hates me - eh join the fucking club.
  
• I have nothing better to do

Remember when LSU closed for three days, but then they changed their minds and fucked everyone up? That sucked.

Anyway, if you're not going to go to New Orleans to party with me, that's cool, just, put on some Paul Burch, drink something with Schnapps in it, and close your eyes and imagine the smell of urine caked dust and vomit, now, concentrate on the sound of a down pour, and a not quite clean smell arising from the earth as that filmish, organic taint washes away. You're almost there, now, think about unzipping my fly, that's right, don't be afraid, stroke it, yeah, it likes that Ha! oh, it really likes that, yeah, I do my Kegel, what can I say, bounce with it, yeah, put it in your mouth, ooh, watch it with the teeth, no, you don't have to take it all, just, you know, play with the head, yeah, that's good, oooh, let's move over there, let me help you out of your pants, sooo moist, oh, baby, goddamn.

Email or call if you want to go. Best.