Well, we finished our set last week at Checkpoint's and i sat down near the stage to smoke a cigarette when Sam, our bass player, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Dude you should really check out your leg." So i did and then realized that there was this little vein thing hanging out of my calf shooting blood all over the stage, all over the floor, and all over the people in the front row. It wouldn't stop bleeding either so i had to do what i've always dreaded and make my first trip to Charity Hospital. I waited for seven and a half hours to get six stitches in that motherfucker. It was horrible. Not to mention the fact that i had to share the waiting room with some girl i had hit in the head with a chair at our show. Her boyfriend kept staring me down all morning, but it was her own fault for standing too close if you ask me. And i ruined my favorite vision street wears too.
How many times have you really hurt yourself because you were just doing something that was stupid? Perhaps you even mentioned before you did said idiotic thing, "Watch this, it will probably hurt!" or "How stupid would I be if ..."
I really hurt my head last night. My second head injury this month.
Me, Jeremy and my cousin Jessica were hanging out and watching the Olympics last night eating Little Ceasars. It was the women's floor exercise competition. The slow-mo shots were amazing. We were like, how do you even learn how to do that? How would you even describe that move to someone? Jeremy was saying you could learn to do anything they were doing in a year if you worked on it like, every day. Jessica said something about being flexible and able to dance and stuff, but not able to even think about doing what they were doing. Then she said, "I don't even know if I could do a back bend anymore..." but she stood up and just did one.
This is when I go "My back won't even bend like that."
Jeremy, "Oh, shut up, yes it will."
Me, "No seriously, I have back problems, it won't work, watch..."
So to prove my point, I get up and head over to the doorway (with pocket doors incidentally) and firmly grasp one of the pocket doors that was sticking out about an inch and a half and start working my way down. I actually thought I was going to make it until my hands were about six inches from the floor and the pocket door retreated into it's pocket.
It really hurt, and I saw stars, and everyone laughed but I can't say I didn't know better.
I need to replace my broken digital camera with a snazzy upgrade. I'm looking for something in the $300-$400 price-range, at least 4.0-megapixels with a decent optical zoom and flash that holds its own. I'd thought about just getting a refurbished Olympus Zoom C-4000 because I really like the one my dad owns, but now I'm thinking I might want something smaller. I looked at a couple of Canon Powershot models on Sunday and I'm thinking one of those might be my best option as far as size and features go.
Any advice? What do you like/dislike about your digital camera? What brands/models do you recommend?
Over a year ago, I made a post announcing that I'd be doing a zine including some responses to a fill-in-the-blank list. A few Killoggers expressed interest, but I never got around to doing the zine, just decided it wasn't such a good idea, or I wasn't sure about a good way to go about getting responses. I don't know -- maybe I was just lazy, or I didn't want to feel obligated to include every response I got, or I was afraid that someone would be bitter with me if I didn't include the response they put so much thought into. Several people asked for the list of fill-in-the-blanks, but Luster was the only member who responded. He got especially creative with his responses (not really what I was looking for, but still amusing). I've been meaning to post these for quite some time -- I feel it's only fair since I never put them in print -- but I just never got around too it.
Speaking of zines, I have something autobiographical under way that should be finished by early October. I'll let everyone know when it's done.
Here are Luster's responses:
One way to get a hand job on a city bus is to
duct tape yoorself to the ceiling and and let your
goods dangle. when it gets packed enough that people
have to stand, they will grab for anything available
to keep their balance. also, its good to pick a bus
route that has alot of bumps and potholes because the
turbulance provides a great in and out simulation on a
well lubed penis.
If you're looking for a good alternative to gay
anal sex i would suggest beastiality. not only is it
vigorous and exciting but its fun and furry too.
another good thing about beastiality are the great
sexual noises animals make. nothing turns me on like
the heavy panting and whimpering yelps of a purebreed
greyhound while i fuck that hot dog in his tight
little greyhound ass.
I sometimes pretend im a really good dancer. if
i was a really good dancer i could grow my hair out
like patrick swaze and wear really tight pants and go
ice skating sometimes. hot chicks dig guy dancers no
matter how gay they look. michael flatley is my all
time favorite hero. when im alone i practice all his
moves and imagine myself dancing with an irish girl
chorus line who arent wearing anything but wooden
shoes and bagpipes. after i get all hot and sweaty
from dancing i usually drink a v8 and watch telemundo.
The people who get noticed are the people with
fake boobs. if u want to get noticed get fake boobs
because everyone is getting them. if u dont have fake
boobs then you will be a freak of nature because fake
boobs are all the rage. the best is when yoo squeeze a
fake boob because they will always go back to its
original shape no matter how much u stretch it, bend
it, bite it or pull it out of shape because they are
made out of the same stuff those stress reliever balls
are made out of. nothing relieves stress like fake
boobs. ask your boss, he will tell ya. people with
fake boobs are successful too. look at pamela anderson
and anna nicole smith. they are great role models for
little girls. all little girls should get fake boobs.
I have a weakness for sex on the bitch. my name
is tomer hanuka and i rilly lik sex on the bitch. back
een my hom country of israel, we are not allowed to
have sex on the bitch because people there are more
holy. heer in amerika however peeple have sex on the
bitch everywher. on the televeeshun on the posters
eeen the bathroom... everywher! eef my mather cot me
doing sex on the bitch in my bathroom, shee wud keel
me. she wud drag me to the corner of the sity and
stone me to the death. shee sas that the bathroom ees
a dirty feelthy place and if you have the sex on the
bitch een the bathroom that yoor babies will be
uncleen. of course they would be uncleen, ees the
bathroom! but aye lik the dirty sex on the bitch i jus
leave the water running so mather donta heer me.
A common misunderstanding is that babies are
people. i think all babies should die because they
arent humans. how stupid is it to have babies? they
are so expensive. they cry and shit and hell, i dont
even think they are cute. i think its cool to kill
babies and besides its convient for people who dont
want them anyways. when was the last time u saw a
babie and you said, wow what a cool babie? never.
babies are stupid. death to babies. unprotected sex
feels good. i like the part where the sperm goes into
the hole but i hate when babies come out the hole.
holes are cool but not when they are making babies.
its a good thing its okay to kill babies because i
dont know what i would do with all those damn babies.
what kind of awful place would the world be like if we
had all these fucking babies???
