The houseboy went over pretty smoothly I think.
We picked him up at 9pm, blindfolded him, and drove him to our apartment.
He stripped naked, we gave him an apron with a pink bow and he got to doing the dishes immediately.
Angie and I painted our toenails and smoked cigarettes, demanded him to hurry up, got him to make me cosmopolitans.
Pretty much every dish in the house was dirty, and he did get them cleaned.
He did a shitty ass job mopping the floor. Its still sticky as hell. Also, when I went for a drink of ice water this morning, I saw that he filled the ice tray only partially, creating little halfassed slivers of ice. I took note of this, and if we let him come back, he's going to pay.
We tape recorded him stating that he was out bitch about ten times. I also wrote politically incorrect and cruel things on his bare butt with lipstick.
We listened to our favorite Turbonegro songs and danced around, waiting for him to pack away all of the trash.
Angie was way too nice to him, and apparently when I left the room, she told him how evil I was, and that that's why she loves me. Whatever, she shouldn't be walking across the room to get some wine when he can do it for her. When the bottom of her wine got warm, I tossed it on the floor and on his feet, and refilled it. I realized that dommes drinking box wine is a little halfassed. Oh well. "This is for us," I told him, "and if you have some idea in your head of some stereotypical bullshit, then you can go out and find it. We don't need you, you are privledged to be here. So obey or just get out."
All in all, it was a pretty standard session, nothing crazy, no peeing or anything like that. As I walked to the door in my beloved Harley boots, they got sticky from the floor, so I got him to lick them clean, making sure he licked the sole and not the leather part.
For such a shoddy job, I gave him a C+. I wrote this down on the postcard below, along with "Thanks for wasting our time." We signed it and let him take it home.
If you want something done right...

So this morning I decided I was going to make use of the Caribou card that has been sitting in my wallet for the past four months. I decided to get one of those cool frosted kinds of coffee with whipped cream on top. It is summer after all.

So I go, and I was excited. People were friendly. One girl behind the counter was laughing because she accidentally got milk in her eye. Everyone was laughing about it. It was the big joke of the morning. Even customers were laughing. It was like I had walked into a happy idyllic coffee land. They cashier told me that not only were there a variety of chilly flavors to choose from, but that TODAY was FREE MIX-IN FRIDAY! That means that you can mix Oreos or Snickers into your Coffee Cooler for FREE!! Well, hell yeah, sign me up!

So I left feeling jubilant with a large chocolate cooler with Oreos mixed in and whipped cream on the top. There were even some Oreo crumbs on the whipped cream.

I have decided that this is the way to start my Fridays as long as the weather is warm enough for frozen drinks and there is money on my Caribou card.

The men in blue are ahl ovah today. Ahhl ovah. They'ah at every intahsection. Waiting to getcha. The men in blue are ahl ovah. Watch out.

I know people have DVDs, Books, and Games that are mine. If you happen to have something of mine, please reply here and let me know what it is so I can eventually get it back.

A bunch of my books and DVDs are loaned out and I want em back sometime!!!

One of my duties at work is to track vacation time and also to let people in my department know when someone is out sick. One day, as a result, I got this e-mail. This is one of my all time favorite office e-mails that I have ever received.



In the event that you need to have something on file for yesterday.

Thanks.

Robin

----- Original Message -----
From: Robin xxxxx
To: xxxx.xxxxx@xxxxxxx.com
Cc: xxxx.xxxxx@xxxxxxx.com ; xxxx.xxxxx@xxxxxxx.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 07, 2002 4:18 PM
Subject: Out


Hi xxxx,

(This is very embarrassing)

I was out of the office today but it was not my original intention. Since taking the antibiotic--amoxocillan, I experienced loose bowel movements. But last evening through this morning that loose movement worsened. Not to be too graphic or too detailed, I had to throw away two panties. This morning I got up and purchased Imodium A-D, and needed to let it work so I called and spoke with Craig, Gary, and Debbie and let them know that I would be in later. Since additional Imodium A-D tablets were needed, I opted not to take the chance of being on the train/subway and not have access to a bathroom.

I will work late on Friday to make-up any work that is needed.

Thanks.

Robin

So I had my first teacher interview yesterday with an awesome school. They needed me to teach fine arts, technology, and community service. So yay, I was stoked. Starting pay was close to 40k, a full 10k more than public schools (it is a charter). A four day work week. 5-10 students per class.

They only interviewed 4 people out of about 25 resumes. From the four they were supposed to call some back for a second interview on MOnday. She said she would call today no matter what. It is now 6:37 Mountain Time. Stalking instinct kicking in. Must break in, rummage through desk. Only kidding. Call me. Need job. Want job. Dream job.

My husband just called from work to ask permission to go to a strip club for a few hours after work tonight with a friend. Of course I said he could go. But he called to ask permission. Go me.