Kara was five minutes late for work today.
Kara opens the office nowadays, because some stupid company initiative has all of her coworkers in DC indefinitely.
So, the office was opened five minutes late.
What can she say to her managers? She can promise to try harder, but she hasn't had the momentum to take on mornings in the last 8 years of working. It's not going to appear out of the blue.
Due to her incompetence, Kara is advised against taking a week of vacation in June.
She reflects on her 10,000 dollars of debt, and her hopes to buy a used car. She thinks about how she wouldn't have been paid for that week anyway.
She wads up her unapproved leave request and tosses it into the trash can with todays junk mail.
I have a psychometrics exam looming that I feel unprepared for. I have about 6.5 hours to study for it, though. Nerves are killing me.
Right now I'm taking a look back at the things I did wrong in my past relationships and how I'm sabotaging the one I'm in now. No matter what, I seem to be doing the same insecure things I have done previously. Knowing that hurts. I have to assess how much damage I've done and what I can do to prevent further damage. Once you kill the goose that laid the golden egg, you can't undo that. I'm basically smothering this person unintentionally and she feels pressured. I don't blame her. My intensity level is too high. I've tried to turn down the volume but ya know, you just can't control emotions. It's even hard to hold back expressions of feelings.
Part of this is due to the fact that I really don't have any friends outside of school here. I don't drink anymore, either. My hobby is surfing the internet, watching movies, and listening to music. I wish those hobbies had other people involved in them, or I wish I had social outlets in Morgan City. I don't. So I focus my attention on my girlfriend. This probably isn't healthy. Although she lives an hour and a half away, she's mentioned that I don't give her the personal space that she needs. I'm trying. The last time I visited didn't turn out to well. Knowing that hurts as well. She doesn't love me any less, I don't love her any less. I guess we just have to wrok out the kinks. None of this stuff is any fun to have in the back of your mind when you have finals.
There are a bunch of people in NOLA and BR that I'd love to visit but I just don't have the gas money. Morgan City, like San Antonio or Tampa, isn't a good enough reason for people to visit me. And I don't blame 'em. I live with my parents and I don't have a whole lot of personal space to entertain guests. Besides, what would there be to do here that you couldn't do better somewhere else?
I'm praying to learn to live. I pray for a healthy, lasting relationship. I pray for academic success. I pray for the ability to understand and appreciate myself. Finally, I pray to be a better, more healthy and functional person.
I don't know why I'm posting this. These are my feelings. I should discuss this in therapy. I do. But I can only see someone once a week. In the interim, I think too much about stuff and screw things up. I mean well. I know that. Again, I just can't seem to get the balance right. I wish I knew how to go about doing all of these things. If I'm trying hard, I don't think anything else can be expected. You do your best and work at stuff.
INGREDIENTS
artichoke(s)
breadcrumbs
one egg per artichoke
parmasean cheese (green can ok)
parmasean or romano cheese (not canned please!)
golden raisins
pine nuts
crushed garlic
olive oil
bacon fat or anchovy paste or extra olive oil
one lemon per artichoke
PREPARE ARTICHOKE(s)
trim thorns from leaves with scissors
steam each artichoke until bright green
dunk in cold water to stop cooking
using your fingers to hold the center leaves of the artichoke open, use a spoon to gently scoop out the spiny “choke” leaving the “heart” intact.
use water to rinse the center of the artichoke of all spiny choke debris
place artichokes upside down to drain excess water
PREPARE STUFFING
add to bowl and mix:
breadcrumbs of any sort (if purchasing them in a can, i buy the italian seasoned ones. one large can will usually be enough for 4 small artichokes. loosely cubed stale french bread will also work if you add your own desired seasonings like parsley, oregano, sage, salt, pepper)
add about one scrambled egg per artichoke
parmasean cheese (this is one of the only recipes where i’ll use the stuff in the green can. but use a LOT of it)
golden raisins
pine nuts
crushed garlic (optional)
olive oil
bacon fat/ anchovy paste/ more olive oil (optional)
mix together until a loose moist consistency is formed. it should still feel somewhat crumbly. you don’t want it to be doughy paste.
STUFF IT
beginning with the outer layers of the artichoke use a spoon to peel back leaves and force stuffing down into the artichoke. proceed around the artichoke spiraling upward and inward. when you reach the center leaves, hold them open and pack the center, all the way down to the heart with stuffing. mound the stuffing all the way to the top, level with the tops of the center leaves. when you are finished it should look like a fat flower. drizzle with olive oil. squeeze a lemon over the artichoke. garnish with a lemon slice over the center stuffing mound.
COOK IT
bake in a preheated oven at 400 degrees (F) until breadcrumbs have thoroughly browned.
remove from oven and sprinkle some good cheese (not from the green can here) either parmasean or romano over the leaves. bake again very briefly until the cheese wilts and melts but does not brown.
it is easier to make several of these at once than one at a time. they refrigerate and reheat well in either a microwave or foil covered in an oven or toaster oven.
EAT IT
remove from oven and let cool. eat by pulling leaves and using your teeth to scrape the stuffing and bit of heart from the leaf edge. discard tough part of leaves. eat main portion of the heart and center stuffing with a fork.
Milky's post got me thinking: When is it when you feel the most stressed out? For me, it's in the morning when I wake up. It is awful. Right when I wake up my mind starts racing over the 1000 things I have to do that day at work. I'm alone with my thoughts and there is nothing there to distract me from the stress. Its enough to make me not even want to get out of bed sometimes. I can feel it in my hands and joints. They ache with the stress. There is nothing worse than waking up stressed out. Once I get into my tasks, the stress goes away, but in the morning, oh the morning, it feels like an anvil sitting on my chest. How about you?
i live in the basement, you see. my basement is acoustically challenged. from the vantagepoint of my domestic nether region, i am able to hear the day to day sounds of my own home as well as those of my two neighboring homes. sometimes it's two live crew, strange pygmy chants, or little boy conversations that should only come out of grown men's mouths. but today, just now, it was something truly special.
i just heard a sucession of six short but enthusiastic fart bursts.
phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt
and then silence. as if in answer to my 'could that really be?', they came again and equally measured:
phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt-phrrnt
now there is silence and the trickling of water upstairs in the turtle pen.
i totally didn't know non-headers could post pictures! why don't you guys and gals post more? pictures are the gateway to interesting posts. i challenge you to pictorially express yourselves.
That's right, I got myself a new ride! 1984 Cadillac Hearse in outstanding condition. I bought it from a local funeral home, where it has been lovingly cared for- kept in a garage and only used for the "final ride", so even after 20 years it only has 32000 miles on it! (So figuring that most funerals were local, let's say within 10 miles, that's something like 3000 dead passengers!!)
A very fitting and timely purchase, as I was just elevated to the priesthood of the Church of Satan on April 30th, the 38th anniversary of the CoS. Anyone planning a wedding? I can officiate and drive you there in style!
erika: guess whaaaat!!!
josh: what?
erika: I pitched my movie idea to a bunch of my friends lastnight and they wanna do it!!!!!
erika: sdkajlfjkldjklsfjklasfsdhkl!@#&*$%
josh: whats the idea?
erika: it's a secret
erika: it's going to be sooooo bad
erika: of course it has to do with cicadas
josh: OH YEAH
josh: HOTT
erika: it has a psycho secretary and dingy mechanic shop and at least 25 death scenes
erika: and kittens
erika: and bad lighting
erika: even tho i know how to do lighting
erika: dklasfjsdfjlakdfjklsdjklsfadfjlsk;dfjlaskasfd
erika: and a monster
josh: is the secretary also hot
erika: OH DUH!
erika: she's hot as shit
josh: sounds cool then
erika: yea and there is going to be a scandelous chic with big boobs runnning thru the woods too
josh: this movie sounds rad
josh: you need a shower scene too
erika: we talked about that
josh: or maybe like she could run through a sprinkler
josh: maybe in an evening gown or something... or like a camisole
erika: well I've been nominated for that scene
erika: and they already told me I have to wear a wife beater
josh: yeah that would work well when you run through the sprinkler
erika: but I think we may just go with torn dress
erika: that buttons in the front
josh: lots of cleavage
erika: how could I avoid it?
josh: haha
erika: there may be a crotch shot too, the last time I dida horror flick I accidentally flashed my panties
josh: man the more the merrier i say
erika: but I was the mutant stick woman and i bet a real mutant lady wouldnt wear undies but it's whatev
josh: maybe she would need to wear undies because her secret weakness was yeast infections
erika: THAT IS FOUL
erika: ahaha
josh: hahaha
I'm on a federal jury panel this week and the case is one of those depressing ones that can't even be made up. The first thing I did after discovering that they were putting me on the jury was to walk to St. Joseph's during the initial recess. Only later did I club a baby seal.
A few things I've learned about federal courts:
1. Bailiffs aren't very attractive people, but since all they do is tell people where to go and will occasionally pass a microphone, they get very lonely and enjoy pointless conversation.
2. Giving jurors wrapped candy is a bad idea, especially when the same lady unwraps a new candy every 15 minutes, drowning out whoever's speaking with the sound of crinkling.
3. Having a bachelors degree (in fine arts, no less), working as a system administrator, and doing so at a university are not as likely to get one rejected as everyone seems to think. I was picked 8th of 8 out of 18 possible.
4. Dress as if you're about to depart on an arctic expedition.
Brian, it's been said that the judge really has no legal standing about how a juror performs other than in the courtroom. When he says "no outside investigation", is there concrete legal backing behind that?
