playin at 11:00 at checkpoints
with eyehategod n evil army

then at oneeyejacks round midnite
with Mr. Quintron...GO!
we got keyboards and i got a new
bedazzled cape with a pink pussy shootin
out green slime on it...killa!

sunday...we be playin jazzfest in the nokia
black metal tent too...openin up for the BOSS!

also anyone in chicago...we will
be playin with a gay punk band called
the rotten fruits at the end of may

new drugs n mayo seven inch
out now! jethrowrecords!

i posted the fema rap on the goner board and
this was the response from ShaunA...whoever the hell he may be...
its goddamn amusing though!

Disaster . . . it can happen anywhere,
But we've got a few tips, so you can be prepared
For floods, tornadoes, or even a 'quake,
You've got to be ready - so your heart don't break.

Disaster prep is your responsibility
And mitigation is important to our agency.

People helping people is what we do
And FEMA is there to help see you through
When disaster strikes, we are at our best
But we're ready all the time, 'cause disasters don't rest.

Black people don't worry if you aint got no money
its a shame you're not white it just aint funny
when disaster strikes here's what to do
just head on down and join the Superdome crew

It aint our fault if you get no peace
some homeless guy fucking your niece
you can stay at home if it aint good enough
and spend the week sitting on your roof

any poets care to add a verse?
i would but i aint got no rap skills.
thats fer fuckin' sure!

As I am sure you all must know....me and Miss Pussycat got out.....most of our instruments were also evacuated, but the entire electronics lab was destroyed and many Pussycat paintings and puppets were also lost. Also, the house (SPELLCASTER LODGE) is questionable.......the front gable blew off and the whole downstairs (the LODGE) was REALLY the underwater dance club for about 3-4 days. Unfortunately the only things dancing were dead animals, benzine, E-coli, fire ants, and human feces........Our entire building structure being condemned is a real possibility. The good news is that as far as I know all Rhinestone Records Krewe are ok......Trachiotomy rode it out along with Strangebone (Jeff Matson), DJ Math Problem (Brian Marchese), Mikey Serabrini, Danger Dan Fusilier (famous painter of Mother in Law), Jamie & Raven, and many others. Antoinette K-Doe (of the MOTHER IN LAW LOUNGE) also stayed and survived but her lounge saw even deeper water than the Lodge. I know that many of you are having various benefits and you should send your money to any place that makes the most sense to you....if you are donating directly to the Lodge please know that the $ will go to replace equiptment and to re-build the Spellcaster because we have no insurance of any kind. It will also go to keep the show on the road for many of the above mentioned Hurricane heroes. The reason I am writing this is because I have been asked by benefit organizers to explain somehow what is happening and where the benefit funds for Rhinestone Records will go.......so, that is my explaination about money........as far as what is happening.......i don't know what the fuck is happening.....this is biblical and it is breaking my heart to see New Orleans burnt, flooded, neglected, ethnically cleansed, and basically shoved underwater to drown........but we can breath underwater baby. Cajun Atlantis has just begun to emerge and the moment those fuckers let us back in the gates, we are going straight to the gun store and then to the boat bar for all the free drinks we can drink. Thank you all for everything........WE LOVE YOU!...............sincerely, Mr.Q and all of Rhinestone Records

In other news, i will be in Seattle this weekend, am flying to Chicago next
wednesday for about a week or so and will eventually end up in memphis
for the GonerFest on the weekend of the 25th of September...i don't really
know what i'm gonna do from there but i will probably hook up with my
old carpentry boss and get back down to NOLA as soon as they open
the doors to the motherfucker...all im bringing are my tools and a bag of
clothes all my records and shit are staying up here in portland...probably
gonna look into getting some disease immunizations while in Chicago too
...it just doesn't make any sense to me to sit up here and flip fucking
hamburgerswhen the only place i've ever felt at home in is totally shattered...
and anyone who's giving up on this is a fucking PUSSY...
new orleans will always be new orleans no matter what it looks like
and the only thing thats gonna make it change is if the people that give it it's character decide to bail right now. oh yeah...we also raised eleven hundred
bucks the other night at our hurricane benefit up here for the goner fund.
See ya at the gun store.

This is from my friend Bevis who stayed in NOLA

I am alive, arguably tougher than any of you all...

I got out today, Sept. 1st, from the worst of all possible worlds. If any of you that don't know me personally saw the tattooed freak on CNN days ago, that was me.

Yes, I rode out the storm, that was the easy part. The hard part was living through the hell that New Orleans became after the fact. MAKE NO MISTAKE, WHAT THE NEWS IS TELLING YOU IS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO THE RAMPANT ANARCHY AND CHAOS THAT IS AND WAS NEW ORLEANS.

Some reasons why:

Roving packs of weapon weilding marauders killing and looting everything in sight.
No power, making the French Quarter wonderful for the first night, a TOTAL NIGHTMARE the next.
Destruction on a level only rivalled by Iraq, SERIOUSLY.
Corpses floating in most parts of the city.
The heat, good lord, the heat...
Police essentially forming gangs of their own, sleepless and out of control.
The military having turf wars in every parish, leaving yet more corpses and scaring the shit out of everyone.
Crazed militia-type behavior from people that you always knew were on the verge, turning them into assholes too ready to kill than help their fellow man.
The stench of organic rot and the imminent threat of diseases long thought extinct.
And many more things I can't bear to tell you all right now for fear of giving you all the cold sweats, I mean it.

Imagine "Apocalypse Now", mix in a generous portion of "28 Days Later", it doesn't even come close. This is something that you will never undestand unless you were there. I am in serious shock, yet somehow calm in the knowledge that I LIVED THROUGH IT.

Yeah, I didn't even know I was that crazy... But I'm not stupid, so I am in Lafayette for a couple of days in sanctuary, then possibly to Texass, who knows....

I kept a storm journal, the results of which will be posted as soon as I have enough p.c. time and the stomach to relive it that long.

Whatever you do, DO NOT GO THERE UNTIL IT IS UNIVERSALLY AGREED THAT IT IS SAFE.

Death rules that place and all that dared to stay any longer...

I am deeply and sincerely touched by the communication I have received as a result of my descent into madness, much love to you all...

This money will be distributed to fellow
rockers left high and dry...
money distributed through Goner records
to new orleans goners calling memphis home

Please send Donations to

Trinity Parish Church Episcopal Discretionary Fund
200 N Elm St
Searcy, AR 72143-5271

put 'Katrina Fund' in subject line of check

paypal to: trinityparish@yahoo.com

checks are preferred... paypal takes around 3%, but whatever you can give is appreciated and needed.

I know the church thing is weird, but it's legit...
i assure you!

In other news...
flying outta Seattle sometime next week...
for Memphis will stay through goner-fest...
then possibly moving to Atlanta for a few months...
may try and help clean up NOLA eventually...
then, off to Sweden!

Can't wait to see my nola friends soon...
been thinking about y'all a lot these past few days...
as a show of solidarity i will be throwing my entire
record collection into the Willamette River tonight...
i figure if my friends can go without them well then so can I...
*matt

PS Josh and Ben stinky and jeff are fine...
email me and i will send you their new phone numbers...
anyone trying to reach friends through cell phones...
text messaging works best...i've found MANY people this way.

heres a few i've found:

"In the French Quarter, most bars that stayed open through the threat of past hurricanes were boarded up and the few people on the streets were battening down their businesses and getting out.

Sasha Gayer tried to get a train out of town but couldn't. So she walked back to the French Quarter, buying supplies on the way, and then stopped at one of the few bars open on Bourbon Street.

"This is a lot more fun than sitting at home listening to apocalyptic media reports,'' she said. "This is how you know it's a serious hurricane. You can't find a slice of white bread in the city, but you can still buy beer.''

AND:

Tina and Bryan Steven, a couple from Forest Lake, Minn., who came to attend a conference of emergency medical services, sat glumly on the sidewalk outside their hotel in the French Quarter.

"We're choosing the best of two evils,'' said Bryan Steven. "It's either be stuck in the hotel or stuck on the road. ... We'll make it through it.''

His wife, wearing a Bourbon Street T-shirt with a lewd message, interjected: "I just don't want to die in this shirt.''

and one more:

Tony Peterson leaned over a balcony above Bourbon Street, festooned with gold, purple and green wreathes as Katrina's first rains pelted his shaved head.

"I was going to the Superdome and then I saw the two-mile line,'' the 42-year-old musician said. "I figure if I'm going to die, I'm going to die with cold beer and my best buds.''

Even in the face of imminent doom you gotta give it up to
the people who stayed to go down with the ship, drunk as a skunk.
Good luck y'all...

well not really, but i got kicked outta
this Iron Lung/Ass End Offend show in PDX
by like twenty dudes who were punchin' me in the head cuz i started
running around the venue like a homo....people who go to see grind
shows are fucking pussies if you ask me...buncha PC Fags who wanna
stand around with their arms crossed and look "intrested".
I'm tired of this bullshit...if you're atta show and you ain't moving
you fucking blow ass...we need to
bring back the VIOLENCE in hardcore..sissies.
other than that, i been working a lot in two shitty kitchen jobs.
the only saving grace is this Jugaloo dishwasher nicknamed ICP
who claims to have witnessed some rabid ICP fan fucking
some jugalette in the ass while standing in the moshpit...He's a real genius.
Plus my boss told me he smoked some crystal meth while watdhing Olivia Nrwton John.
Total clost case....

Anyway, it's about time i took advice from some
total strangers on what i should do with my life...
if you got any suggestions drop me a line in the
redponded....I need some direction in my life...
Keep in mind i gotta undergraduae dwgree in english
history and philosophy...
Someone tell me rgsd

This is for real!
I swear!

Man, I was in the Portland Sprint Store trying to change my number over
from a New Orleans area code and i was fucking around with the display
phones when it hit me - I had to shit so fucking bad that I nearly blew out
my jeans. I grabbed my girlfriend and tried to make it down to a coffeeshop
two blocks away, but I knew I couldn't possibly hold it in for such a long
distance. So i ducked into the Quizno's right next to the Sprint Store and
made a beeline straight for the unisex bathroom, dropped my pants, and in
the process of sitting down on the toilet seat, began to shit in mid-air. My
ass finally made contact with the porcelin bowl and was it fucking disgusting.
I've been eating a ton of cheese since i moved up here and had decided
earlier that day to drink a few cups of coffee to grease the wheels, you know?
So I continued to blow out the bathroom for a few minutes and then just
kinda sat there for a while, savoring my relief. I finally decided to wipe and
bent over with a wad of paper when I finally noticed the horror of my present
situation. My ass had exploded in mid-air with such ferocity that I had shat all
over the toilet seat, the back of the tank, the wall, the floor, the other wall, even
the little plastic thing that holds the scrub brush. It was like a Jackson Pollack
painting up in there. I proceeded to clean off my ass and then contemplated
leaving the sub shop real quick or cleaning up the mess. I still can't believe
that i did this, but i actually cleaned it up. Only the bowl though...I left the spray
all over the walls. The only reason I did this was because I was worried that there
was someone right behind me and that's a hell of a bluff to pull off. Of course,
there was no one behind me, so it was all in vain. Although my girlfriend was
really proud of me. I washed my hands too. Easily my best shit story since my
shortlived stint as the "Phantom Shitter" when I would shit in the urinal of the Saint
during Benji Lee from Supagroup's shifts. It was a hard maneuver since there was
no lock on the door. Now that's a real hard situation to worm your way out of.
I also upperdecked every toilet that i had to shit in from Philadelphia to Syracuse
when I was in twelfth grade.

Other than that, Portland is not so bad. I saw Das Oath the other night in
some shitty club called the food hole. They were fucking great. I am still
looking for Pig Champion but i can't find him. I don't think he gets out much.
I have also met three people that have smoked crack with King Louie. Also,
Judas Priest is playing on July fourth, but that's another post.
I got fired from a job already too - totally my fault. Oh yeah...
I also terrorized some guy the other night from that shitty band the Gossip.
I told hime the only reason that he was in such a shitty band was to hump
awkward college art school students. He completely agreed with me.
Then he agreed to play the sax during Sex Bomb in my Flipper / Fang
cover band project that I've been working on for a year, tentatively entitled
FLANG
or
FLAPPER.
Which do you prefer?

When in Portland, don't use the bathroom of the Quizno's
on 12th and Broadway.

well after nearly having my head blown off the other week as
i walked through my lovely Treme neighborhood, i've decided that
the life of an urban pioneer is no life for me. So I'm getting the fuck
outta this shithole before I die. Plus its getting really fucking hot. So
adios New Orleans, it's been real, but i gotta go get my shit together
somewhere else. Anyone in the area- holla.

i almost got my head blown off
the other day...for real.

Ever since i've started working construction, I listen to WTUL for like eight hors a day. All the music is pretty fucking horrible unless you're really into Iron & Wine or Dizzee Rascal, but i've been winning a shitload of free tickets from them. So anyway, Neil Hamburger played at One Eyed Jack's on Wednesday and i won some free tickets. He was pretty funny, but then i had to piss and he called me a prick when i got up to urinate. In retaliation, I pissed in a plastic cup and gave it to him. He picked it up, thanked me, and then realized it was piss because it was warm. He got pretty pissed off and kicked it off the stage. He was too smart for my clever ruse. Next time I'll ice it down. He then proceeded to invite me onstage to "hang myself" from the rafters. I just used it as excuse to steal all of his beer and a bottle of white wine. After I chugged all that shit, things started to get pretty fucked up. I fell over in the bathroom and shattered their sink. So now i'm not allowed in there until we open up for MDC. I left my wallet on top of Quintron's van in the ninth ward and then found it about an hour later near the tracks, minus my ID and library card. He drops me off on Decatur street at this shitty bar called Aunt Tiki's (the old Hideout). Some chick smarts off to me about being broke so i threw her crossword puzzle on the floor. The bartender told me to leave, i threw my Chartreuse drink in his face, and then the next thing I know I'm being chased down Decatur by the bartender, four of his friends, and a barstool. One of the goths punches me in the face, my nose starts shooting blood all over the street, and i went into the Abbey to stuff a bunch of napkins up my nose. They threw me out for bleeding all over the bar. By this time it's about ten am and i've got nowhere else to go except home. On my way back to the Treme I run into this guy i know who's dropping off his kid at school. He takes me to a dog park and starts giving me a bunch of Milwaukee's Best he had in his backpack and free cigarettes. I couldn't even get up off the ground at this point and started to pass out next to a condom wrapper. i called everyone i knew trying to get a ride home inbetween prank calls to the dickhead bartender at Aunt Tiki's. Finally Bateman gives me a ride home and i slept for twenty-four hours and missed two days of work. It was worth it, but it's kinda embarrassing admitting that you got beat up by a goth.

Happy Saint Patrick's Day



Blidget.

hey bitches.
i'm in fucking copenhagen after driving twelve
hours through a swedish blizzard. this tour is
a fucking disaster - two guys flew out of stockholm
last night, but we're gonna try and make it through
without them. amsterdam will follow tomorrow.
France sucks, Italy is a fucked up boot that should
be cut off the continent and sent over to Africa.
or better yet just sink it in the mediterranean.
Their fucking pizza is horrible. being the merch guy sucks
because everyone comes to me to ask me if the kajun SS is
a racist band. one guy even asked me if we were pro-white
or pro-black. i told him pro-black of course. like that even makes
any fucking sense at all. some old guy came to see the show in
hamburg cuz he thought it was going to be a zydeco show. then i
sang a gg allin cover with the die rotzz and he wouldn't talk to me anymore.
i like military time. i like the kilometer cuz it makes you feel
like you're getting somewhere faster. Germany shows
porn in the burger king and is obsessed with their own
doo doo feces. there's not many black people here. or pick up trucks.
i seen four this whole trip and they were all japanese. Panzer saw one chevy
silverado pick-up truck here. the swedes are the best of europe.
they eat lots of hot dogs with this weird shrimp/mayo sauce on it
called shrimp salad. I'ts delish. they also got ham paste in tubes.
i wanna move there and leech off their social welfare system.
i think i'd be pretty good at that. all the women are real fine in sweden,
even the one's that work at McDonald's. Plus they're into black metal there.
King Louie got in a fight with a swedish mom at mc'donalds
in sweden because he was in the wrong line. She informed him
of this and he told her to shut up because he was from america
and he knew more about hamburgers than she did. she then asked him
why he didn't go ahead and go back there then. To which he replied,
"I'm not going to leave until i'm done fucking your daughter.* her daughter
was like four. It was pretty hilarious. he keeps on threatening us to leave
the tour unless we provide him with a jar of pickles to eat every day. he
drinks the vinegar too. it's really something else.
that's it for now. more will follow. man these euro keyboards really suck.
everythings all fucked up, moved around and they have all these weird symbols all over the place. what the fuck is wrong with these people?

My life is in shambles right now.
I'm barely employed and just bounced this month's rent check.
Today I woke up in the back of a pick-up truck on General Taylor at 11:30. SOme guy was passed out in the front seat with a bottle of wine pouring out over the carpet in the truck. I have no idea who he was or what i was doing there. I have also discovered that I don't need money anymore. I just go out broke and everyone buys me drugs and booze. Sometimes i come home with money and i don't even have anything to sell. Just the other week this crazy stripper gave me 20 bucks because I'm "out of touch with reality." I've also been hanging out with this gay schizophrenic Decatur Street bum named "Bri-ann" everyday.

I'm going to Europe too as the merch guy on the Kajun SS / Die Rotzz "My War" Artic Shatter tour. Here's the schedule - tell your friends. Mangina EU will make it's debut. Our driver is a meth dealer.

Saturday FEB 05 - MADRID spain
King Louie One Man Band (no SS), Die RotZz + more tba... at Gruta 77, I think. A birthday party for a website.

***Sunday FEB 06 - BARCELONA spain
Alberto this one's on you, dog.

Monday FEB 07 - PERPIGNAN france
House party w/ The Fatals. Stay tuned.

Fat Tuesday FEB 08 - LUCCA (outskirts) italy
At 00-UFO or something. Zanutto in the house!!!

Wednesday FEB 09 - LUCERNE switzerland
At Sedel Club w/ Lightnin' Beat Man

Thursday FEB 10 - KASSEL germany
Not a show. Pilgrimage to a moat. Before noon.

Thursday continued - HAMBURG germany
Yes. From Lucerne to Hamburg. For road warriors only. At the Beat Club. I hear DM Bob will be there.

Friday FEB 11 - GOTEBORG sweden
Venue name, please. And can A S H E S play ?

Saturday FEB 12 - STOCKHOLM sweden
Kafe 44 w/ Martin Savage and his broken hip.

Sunday FEB 13 - off off off off off

***Monday FEB 14 - BREMEN germany
Venue tba... Moorat Fingers on call.

***Tuesday FEB 15 - AMSTERDAM nl
Venue tba

Wednesday FEB 16 - Kortrijk BELGIUM
@Cafe The Pits

***Thursday FEB 17 - PARIS france
w/ Anteenagers MC (venue c/o Kemp Boyd tba)

Friday FEB 18 - BORDEAUX france
LOCAL 61 rue de tauzia. Early show (20 o'clock)

Total disaster is imminent.

Authentic Kettle Face: "When I looked at that guy's arm's I didn't feel so bad about my life"

Left Ankle: Black man staring at Chimpanzee, dotted red lines connecting eye, surrounding text: "Man and the mirror"

Right Calve: "Portrait of a young Negro wearing a baseball cap with surrounding text "Jive Turkey"

Left Knee: Old School script reading "Sweet tea"

Left Forearm: Artist rendition of a "Shocker" complete with with fingered pussy on pinky

Right Thigh: Cock of Ages with flying toasters

Left Ankle: "Tit monster"

Left Arm: Portrait of young woman playing "skin flute"

anyone care to add?

6, 7, 8, 9,
Beat feads in!
"Reagan message to minority voters take thirty-seven"
thirty-eight....thirty-nine...huh!
so good...so fine...slip me a little keybored
uhhhh...awd have mercy...let me hear a little bass now Nancy
So GOOD! So Fine! you cookin' now mama Thank you deer.
Oww! Good God. Dat be fine.
We're in a grove now.."that's a groove now"
OK, were in a grove
thank you dear!
Slip me a little keybored KAT!
OWWW! Good God, dat be funky!
OK people gotta get down

I got an open mind on civil rights, my youngest son grewup in titghts@
BLAh...BlaH...Blah...
(Kool Herd)

Fuck YU!
If you don buy owe cd you el ceeapo
Me drunk
bye!

Say. we want

Mangina played in Savannah last weekend. Chad had some guy buy him a Jameson cuz he was wearing white pants and "it's time we put black to rest and bring back white clothes." Met a skinhead named fluffy who was about eight feet tall and had an Iron Cross tattooed on the side of his head. Chad our gutarist was real good with him.

C: "What's your name"
F: "Fluffy"
C: "Is it because you're a good fluffer?"
F: "How would you like a broken nose?"

Turns out he's called fluffy cuz he did too much ectasy in the military. We ask to sleep at his house and listen to skrewdriver all night. He says yeah, but then ditches us. He also thougt paul's name was "Ball."

Anyone coming to NOLA next weekend for the Rockening?
www.rockening.com

Well, we finished our set last week at Checkpoint's and i sat down near the stage to smoke a cigarette when Sam, our bass player, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Dude you should really check out your leg." So i did and then realized that there was this little vein thing hanging out of my calf shooting blood all over the stage, all over the floor, and all over the people in the front row. It wouldn't stop bleeding either so i had to do what i've always dreaded and make my first trip to Charity Hospital. I waited for seven and a half hours to get six stitches in that motherfucker. It was horrible. Not to mention the fact that i had to share the waiting room with some girl i had hit in the head with a chair at our show. Her boyfriend kept staring me down all morning, but it was her own fault for standing too close if you ask me. And i ruined my favorite vision street wears too.

yeah, i paid twenty bucks to see W.A.S.P. on Monday night at the horrible house of blues and sat through this shitty cover band called Brah! - man they sucked real bad - and drunk as hell, bought about a pound and a half of of raw itialian sausage from the pizza place across the street to throw at that guy with the purple lightning comiming out of his eyes called "Blackie Lawless." Man did he get pissed! During the encore when the lights went down i hit him right in the side of the face as he called for the crowd of cheeseballs to kick my ass (none of which rose to the challenge). Then i got thrown out by the meathead security with my arms extended in triumphant greatness and for his encore he had to play an acoustic love song in front of everybody, mad as hell! So if he's comin' your way don't hesitate to go to throw raw meat at him since he's old as Methusaleh and "over" the antics now. But don't go expecting a good show because they really blew. Then i got strep throat real bad the next day. Sunday, I'm going to mexico.
And anyone in NOLA on friday the 13th of august go see mangina and face first at checkpoint's. Its free.

P.S. Josh your package is on its way

All Hail Mangina!
We embark upon our virgin Spring Break Tour:
Upcoming shows that are going to be fucking awesome:

March 25th, Neutron Bomb in Hotlanta the Black Valhalla, with the Carbonas and somebody else? This show was originally scheduled to be at Lenny's but do to some stupid policy change there we had to move it to the Neutron Bomb. It will be better at the Neutron Bomb and there will be less poseurs.

March 26th, Tasty World in Athens with the Carbonas and a couple of "hard hitting" local bands.

March 27th, the Handlebar in Pensacola. We're playing with the Hibachi Stranglers and some band called Boat. Then chilling out on the beach the following day, getting Hawaiian Tropic rubbed into our back, drinking pina coladas and eating bananas.

March 28th: our triumphant return to New Orleans with which we will be intervied on WTUL's metal show with the murder band and Willy the Reatard aka MC Spanky, the latest heir to the throne left vacant with the passing of Wesley Willis.

March 29th, at the Hi-Ho in New Orleans, a New Orleans Battle Royale: us, the Murder Band, Mexico 1910 and Glorybee. Spanky will rap between sets with songs such as "I may look like a Spic but I ain't" and "I stole Frankenstein's Bride."

For those of you that may not know me I am Matt "mattgoon" Muscle - some of you may remember me from such events as mammy's Endymion party 2002 or any given weekend on Decatur Street.

Check out the legacy that is Mangina, New Orleans' True Kings of Black Violence:
www.geocities.com/manginanola
Photographic Documentation: www.geocities.com/theunfriendly1

Thanks for finally drawing me a head Ben...
*muscle