hey guys! i went to the renegade craft fair last weekend and i got to meet some awesome killoggers like nathan and evan and michelle, and i saw kiche and had a table with ben and cam. it was super hot and a lot of fun. my book actually did really well and people were really excited. i was interviewed on this web radio show thing and apparently the guy had a lot of nice things to say but i didn't listen to it because i don't want to be embarassed if i think i sound stupid. this was a great experience and i am definitely going to do another book in time for crafty bastards this year. i think my first project is going to be a comic based on notorious b.i.g.'s JUICY. drawings of what i used to think the lyrics were before the wonders of the internet/lyrics websites.

there are a bunch of the coloring book left over (like probably 50 but i have about 30 of them) and i want to make them available to my killoggs friends (thanks for the suggestion josh!). basically they are $5 for a book and a pin (the same likeness of pryor that is on the cover, just a close up of his upper body) shipped. if you want to buy 5+ books they are 2$ each plus $1 for shipping (so if you wanted 5 books it would be $11 and i'd throw some pins in for good measure). the books are 10 pages/10 coloring pages fyi. paypal to ericawaldorf at gmail dot com. just include your address and what you want in the message and i will try to send them out today or tomorrow.

i don't always recycle, even though accumulating garbage is harmful to the environment and can make people sick. i shop at walmart occasionally, even though walmart stands for the inverse of freedom and social responsibility. i eat a lot of processed food and don't always support small and/or organic farms. occasionally i do things that may be considered "illegal". i drink alcohol, despite rampant alcoholism amongst americans - especially poor, indigent folk.

sometimes everyone is a little bit of the "bad guy". and i think that's okay. it's really hard not to be a hypocrite. not everyone can be ian mackaye. but the most important thing about being a good guy or a bad guy is that you have agency in those decisions (even the illegal ones, to some extent).

this is why i really, really loved the movie thank you for smoking. it manages to drive the idea of human beings' agency and free will home. i think that our world has shifted to a place where people no longer feel entirely accountable for the decisions they make, good or bad. we've become completely irresponsible and overly litigious, and it has caused a sort of mania that when you step outside of our world for a minute and look back in, it looks like a circus full of clowns.

but maybe i'm wrong, maybe not everyone is a little bit of a bad guy. perhaps i justify my bad-guyisms because i was born to be a bad guy, and my whole life is saturated in "blood money". my entire youth and young adulthood was sponsored by the liquor industry. those bottles of wine or liquor you may have bought at some point if you were ever in nj - a little bit of that helped pay my tuition. thank you, drunks! maybe the world would be better off without alcohol and drugs and cigarettes and processed sugar and dairy products and fur and anything else people rally against.

the point is, that isn't entirely our decision to make for anyone but ourselves, and our children (until they are 18, of course). you show me an american adult who doesn't know that cigarettes are potentially harmful or addictive (or drugs or alcohol or sugar etc) and i will show you a problem with the educational system in this country. i will show you a person whose parents didn't care, or whose grandparents didn't care about their parents. half of the products on the market today COULD hurt people, but at some point the responsibility for peoples health has to end with the decisions they make for themselves.

so it begins. the religious right starts pushing legislation banning abortion with the hope that their cases reach the supreme court and roe v. wade will be overturned. i'd like to shake all those 23 state senators hands in south dakota, and congratulate them for potentially becoming murderers themselves. even if made illegal, abortions will continue to happen, and many women will die along with those treasured fetuses they are so determined to protect. fuck you, usa. you don't deserve to win the olympics anyway.

this is not about saving those "innocent lives", but about men asserting control over women and their sexuality. the thought of being force to carry out a pregnancy that was the result of rape, a 9 month - or even life-long - reminder of that rape? let's just say my heavy bag is going to have a hole in it by the end of tonight.

S.D. Senate Bill to Ban Most Abortions

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By CHET BROKAW Associated Press Writer

February 22,2006 | PIERRE, S.D. -- Legislation meant to prompt a national legal battle targeting Roe v. Wade, the landmark 1973 Supreme Court decision legalizing abortion, was approved Wednesday by the South Dakota Senate, moving the bill a step closer to final passage.

The measure, which would ban nearly all abortions in the state, now returns to the House, which passed a different version earlier. The House must decide whether to accept changes made by the Senate.

"It is the time for the South Dakota Legislature to deal with this issue and protect the lives and rights of unborn children," said Democratic Sen. Julie Bartling, the bill's main sponsor.

Bartling and other supporters noted that the recent appointment of Justices John Roberts and Samuel Alito make the Supreme Court more likely to consider overturning Roe v. Wade.

President Bush, a Republican and an abortion foe, might also have a chance to appoint a third justice in the next few years, they said.

Opponents argued that the measure was too extreme because it would allow abortions only to save the lives of pregnant women.

The bill would make it a felony for doctors or others to perform abortions and carries a penalty of up to five years in prison.

The measure passed the Senate 23-12.

More information about this bill:

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i made this for my friend who is dressing up as tom cruise's character in risky business for his halloween party on friday. you know: button down shirt and underwear. so this is the undershirt.

what's your costume?

i just secured a ticket to see LIFETIME and 108 at the church in philadelphia tomorrow night. when i first heard this was happening, i sort of blew it off because yesterday i had no money for a ticket and was just generally exhausted from not having been in town AT ALL this summer. but last night i came home and listened to hello bastards and then had a late night dance party to jersey's best dancers in my living room.

i went to 108's last show ever at the princeton arts council in 1996. i went to lifetime's last show at the melody bar in 1997. i was a sophomore and senior in high school for those shows. i was never really a huge 108 fan, and i am surprised there is such a clamor for a reunion. lifetime, however, were an epic part of my adolescence. ari wrote the soundtrack to my first loves and losses and general teen angst. he really captured the life of a teenage punk in central jersey, but apparently from the sound of it, he really captured the life of a mid 90's punk teenager in general. over the years when i've met people from the other side of this country, the ones who liked lifetime and never saw them were always in awe of the fact that i had such easy access to them. i feel lucky, and i am really glad that some people who never got the chance will get to see them now. i can't believe how excited i am about this. it reminds me of how i felt for their last show, standing in the rain in a line outside the melody hoping i'd get in. i was the last person they let into the first set that day. not having to wait was the best part. and now i have to wait 28 hours and it's killing me. i am psyched. i am going to wear a sensefield tshirt to this or some shit.

share your lifetime stories here if you have them.

a week from saturday, i turn 25.
up until i turned 24, i felt really accomplished in my life. i graduated college where i was bored but excelled. i was studying for the gre and planning to attend a phd program in history in the fall of 05. i had a job at a museum and had my research and writing published in exhibits and in a one-day-to-be-published book. i organized shows in my basement in philadelphia, the proceeds from which often benefitted really positive causes like paying for self defense courses for women who otherwise could not afford them. up until age 24 riding my bike was a revolution, and i really lived what i believed.

in year 24, i spent a lot of time on the internet, drinking beer and being crazy. while i am kind of down on myself about it in some ways, i also think about all the time i spent during those 21st, 22nd and 23rd years busting my ass to get so much done to benefit other people. but the real benefit was to myself. in my head, i was taking a year off to collect myself and "enjoy" myself. i thought that going out drinking and dancing and throwing parties was enjoying myself. and in moderation, it is.

i went through this once before. it's disappointing that i didn't see this coming, even. but i guess i do it because i need it, and then snap back out of it and into a more empathetic section of my brain. i am back in there again, and i am ready to make things happen again. i am looking to hopefully get a show on radio cpr, i am organizing a bike race - and if it goes well i will be organizing more to raise money for radio cpr - and i made a valiant return to a life of veganism.

the moral of the story is: i am happier when i feel like i am doing something with my life that positively affects other people. when i am not, i am only behaving in a way that NEGATIVELY affects me. it makes so much sense on paper but in reality it's a lot harder to strike the balance between dfferent types of fun.

but of course i couldn't have a birthday without a BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!
but this year there is also a BIKE SCAVENGER HUNT!!!
on the evening of july 23rd, all you folk with bikes* should meet up at malcolm x park at approximately 7pm. there you will team up with a buddy and collect various items and dc information for the next couple of hours and then cross the finish line at MY HOUSE FOR A MULTIKEG JAMMY JAM! you know where i live. if not send an email to my head.

* folks without bikes - there are other ways to participate and you can email me to find out. or just show up to the party at my house at party time and bring some booze.

p.s. since it's my birthday you all should buy me presents

thanks to all the killoggers who came to the bbq last night that i co-hosted with my lady cat. it was fun times. except for the broken foot thing. it'll get better.

there is a party at my house this friday, april 1st and shit ain't no joke.

there is a lot of transition happening in the lives of my friends, a lot of which involves moving and touring. this may be the last weekend that the majority of my friends are all in dc at the same time, so sarah and i decided we should celebrate that - especially since it is FINALLY starting to feel like spring.

so say good-bye to the nice boys in manhunter, food for animals and a day in black and white as they leave for their respective tours (though not all together). also say good bye to mike petillo as he is roadie for adibw and to jen who is roadie for manhunter/ffa. also like language are going on tour, featuring fellow killoggers matthew and sean.

that's a lot of friends who will be traveling to lots of places in the next month.

so FRIDAY lets PARTY at PARTY TIME. bring some beer or like, whatever else (like that time redbeard brought the bag of vegan chipwiches) and hang hard. or something.

also if you don't know where i live feel free to email me for details by clicking on the little envelope guy under my head.

this morning (afternoon) i managed to drag myself out of bed and go shopping so that i could buy supplies to make vegetarian cheesesteaks for sarah and i tonight. i rode my bike up to yes! on columbia and did some shopping. then i rode to safeway. on the way home from safeway, messenger bag overflowing with delicious and nutritious foodstuffs (and us magazine), i started my trek home.

i got less than a block away when something small and blue caught my eye in the road. as i passed it i realized it was a cell phone, unscathed despite its treacherous location. i stopped and backed up and grabbed the phone and put it in my pocket. i continued my ride home, thinking about how i would go about finding the owner of said phone. should i make a post to craigslist? should i look up a name like MOM or DAD in the phone book to call? i'd never found something like a cell phone before and i wasn't sure how to go about returning it.

i approached irving on mt pleasant street, and the mystery phone rang. i pulled over and grabbed it from my pocket, and the name on the caller id was SHAUNA. i thought 'ha, that'd be funny if it is killoggs shauna!' so i answered the phone and said "hi, do you know whose phone this is because i just picked it up from the middle of the road on columbia!" she responded that it is her husbands phone and we figured out how they could retrieve it. seeing how i was on a bike, i offered to just come to them - back to the car where i found the phone.

as i approached i saw a couple standing by said car, and the woman standing there bore a striking resemblance to a certain killoggs head. i realized that holy shit it IS shauna and when i returned the phone i explained who i am to their surprise.

i think none of us knew how to react to the situation. it was certainly an extremely bizarre concidence. but some things are just meant to be.

hi shauna! it was nice to meet you and your lovely husband today!

but that really wouldn't make this post different than any other post i've ever made to any weblog or message board in my life. it's incredibly awesome that i am so consistent.

i posted several weeks ago about how my bike, my love - my LIFE - was stolen from outside of my place of employment from a guarded, gated courtyard. i am a bike commuter. it's who i am. i am not happy unless i am physically responsible for my means of transportation. i am like a slug during the day if i don't get that adrenaline burst every morning on my way into work.

so of course, when my bike was stolen i cried. a lot. i don't have another bike. i am working on getting another bike just in case something like this happens, but since i hadn't been gainfully employed since i bought the last one in the spring of 2002 until october of 2004, it wasn't happening.

the morning of friday february 4th, i came into work on my roommate sarah's bike, which is sort of a miserable ride. it is, however, better than nothing. i signed onto aim and checked my work and personal emails, and at around 10 i received an im from my friend jeff that said I HAVE YOUR BIKE. he imed me a number to call and i spoke with a woman named amanda who works as a dispatcher at (to remain unnamed - even in the responses!) courier company. one of her messengers brought the bike into her office and asked her to watch it until his friend came to pick it up. she looked the bike over, and being an avid cyclist herself noticed some things about it that were...fishy.

she noticed that the seat was a selle italia LDY [for lady] and that the ulock was still fastened around the head tube. she noted that the cranks are shimano dura ace and nicer than anything said messenger would put on a bike. knowing that this messenger has a pretty serious criminal history and that he has been rumored to steal bikes often, she started calling around to bike shops in dc to see if anyone had reported this bike stolen.

one of the people she called was a guy named kevin whom i do not know. however my friend jeff had sent out a mass email about my bike, in attempt to help me recover it a few weeks prior that kevin remember receiving. he passed the info along to amanda that jeff knew whose bike it is and amanda got in touch with jeff. jeff immediately got his behind out of bed and rode down to this courier company to check and see if the bike was mine. upon arrival he recognized it as my bike and tried calling me.

except i'd changed my cell phone number about 6 weeks ago and he didn't know it. he did know that i am usually on im at work so he signed on from this woman amanda's computer at work to send me the message that they'd found my bike.

i took a cab down there and was reunited with pretty much the only physical object in the world that i truly love. i'll admit that in a certain regard, i was mildly relieved that i'd lost this bike because it was the last really strong emotional and physical tie i had to my exboyfriend. the first time we ever hung out we worked on building this bike. we rode everywhere together while we dated and for a good while it was on bikes that were fraternal twins. upon having the bike back, i realize that bike is so much more than a reminder of something that was lost but rather of something that was gained. because i wouldn't trade any of those memories or this bike for anything in the world. it's not something i will ever sell. it was the first thing that i ever felt was truly MINE.

i plan on keeping it that way.

(more about the guy who actually stole the bike in the responses)

today my bike was stolen.

for those of you who know me, this is a really horrible thing. i rely on my bike to take me pretty much everywhere i want to go, for exercise and to maintain my sanity. it was my favorite "thing" i have ever owned. i put it together from scratch. each part was obtained separately and either installed by me or fuzzy [my bike mechanic buddy who pressed the headset and built one of the wheels etc]. the first time my exboyfriend john ever asked me to hang out, was to work on building this bike when it was still in pieces. some of my amazing friends in philly donated parts and bought me early birthday presents just to get it buil t- because they knew how important it was to me. when i looked at that bike i didn't just see a bike, but i saw joe teel, pat engelman, john robinson, amanda mahoney , fuzzy amongst others. on august 16, 2002 i was walking my bike into the storage closet at the architecture firm where i worked at the time and looked down at it and reveled in its beautiful simplicity. when i got to my desk i immediately called old city tattoo and made an appointment for that evening to get a chainring tattooed on my wrist. in that bike i saw the freedom to get whereever i wanted to go whenever. it made me feel alive.

that bike was safety for me. i knew i could outride anyone who ever tried to tail or chase me. i knew on a bike i was safer than walking late at night. i knew with a ulock in my back pocket i was ready for anything.

i wish i had known this morning that when i rode to work it would be the last time.

i know this seems very dramatic, and maybe it is. i will get another bike. but that bike will always be the bike i had to get to replace the bike i loved. and it will never be the same.

photos from
the day i brought her home

it was one of the best days of my life.

whoops middle of the afternoon xmas party and i had a lot of wine and now i am on the internet at work not doing work being drunk. who else got drunk at their xmas parties? did the xmas parties even happen yet? yo holler i am afraid to leave work because if i try to ride my bike right now i would probably veer off into traffic and die someone come meet me at big hunt for half price burgers. word? word.

ho ho ho
happy family

chainsaws. sirens blaring. hollering.

mt. pleasant is on fire. or rather, ercilia's - the fine dining establishment on the corner of mt. pleasant street and irving street, is currently ablaze. i never ate there but often appreciated the smell of fried wafting down the block towards my humble home, late evenings when i was spending time ablaze on my porch. i wonder how those french fries were. i guess i'll never know, since that place is completely gutted at this point.

so can flames jump across the street or am i safe to go to sleep?