I really want to see the premiere of Spike Lee's "When the Levees Broke, a Requiem in Four Acts," tonight, but he, or HBO rather, decided to broadcast it at the same time as Monday Night Football with the New Orleans Saints taking on the Dallas Cowboys. WTF? Come on man! Making me choose between a much-anticipated documentary on the horrendous destruction of my beloved city of New Orleans and my equally beloved New Orleans Saints on Monday Night (which we almost never get)? Too cruel. Well, I guess I'll have to catch the re-broadcast on HBO because there ain't no way I'm missing Reggie Bush and Deuce run the Cowgirls into utter defeat!

Hey, Killoggs, I'll be in Los Angeles tomorrow for a week or more. Any killoggs people out there? Anyone wanna get together? Shoot me a message/email!

Bibbly

So, I finally made it up to Denver a couple days ago. I kinda overshot my mark, however, and am living up in the mountains just west of the city. I expect I'll return to my more urban lifestyle soon enough. I can only haul my southern ass up and down these mountains so many times a day.

It's really beautiful up here. I've basically spent my last couple of days just driving all around marvelling at the mountains, snow, cliffs, wildlife, bubbling creeks, tunnels and whatnot. I figure I'll just bum around until I feel the need to get a job again. Lets just say that I'm really not feeling that need right now.

Anyway, I'll write more once I can make myself sit in front of a computer for more than a couple minutes at a time! Chow! Be good Killoggs!

Bibbly

P.S. I haven't sighted any hacky sacks or dreadlocks yet. I suppose they haven't woken from hibernation yet. I'm making an excursion to Boulder today to see if I can't smoke the hippies out of their hole.

FINAL FOUR BABY!!!!!!!!!!

Sooooo, I am about to be finished Saturday with my test taking to become a member of ye olde Colorado Bar Association. Thus, I will have a few weeks to kick up my feet and take some time for myself for the first time in, like, forever. I've realized that I haven't read a really good book in many many years. Killoggs, I need your help. Please post ONE good, no, great, book that you have read recently to help me on my way. The book can be of any genre, fiction, nonfiction, whatever. I do ask, however, that you refrain from listing a billion books as I am easily confused and won't be able to pick one. Just give me one please. Also, please refrain from listing professional manuals, textbooks or overly specialized texts (that means no books on quantum mathmatics, Nathan). Think leasure, think intellectually stimulating, now GO!

Please Help,

Bibbly

When I think of New Orleans, these sounds jump into my head:



Ultimate Rebirth Brass Band
Rebirth Brass Band



Look-Ka Py Py
The Meters



Rock and Roll Gumbo
Professor Longhair



Where there's Smoke, There's Fire
Buckwheat Zydeco



The Wild Tchoupitoulas
The Wild Tchoupitoulas

What does your city sound like to you? (In five albums or less.) All albums are available on the infernal iTunes for sampling or purchasing. (No, I don't know how to post links, sounds, or any of that other shit.)

Killoggs needs more Scotch and Flamethrowers.

It was great seeing everyone over Christmas, including various members of the killoggs army. I met with Kiche, Emily and Rick on Xmas Eve at Cafe Du Monde in Da Quarters. We drank much cafe au lait, made voodoo dolls in the likeness of Milky, Jeff and Meredith and then stomped them into dust.

I randomly ran into Zack for the first time at the Red Star that night. Very cool guy. We exchanged awkward hellos chatted, made voodoo dolls and subsequently stomped them into dust.

I went to Louie's with Nathan and Heather. Much fun. We ran into Talice there. Amazing. We ate, drank coffee, made voodoo dolls and stomped them into dust.

Now I'm at home, waiting out the year until I can shed my skin and begin hating everyone afresh.

Cheers!

Bibbly

So, I gave my two weeks notice to my firm today and I feel equal parts freedom and supreme nervousness.

Regardless, I am loooooooooooooooooooooooooaded right now.

Captain's Log 11:00p.m. New Orleans, Post-Katrina.

I R Locust.

bibbly

Egg Nog



For or Against?

Discuss.

So, to register for the Colorado Bar Examination, the Bar Association needs me to list the address of every residence I've had for the past ten years. Seeing as I cannot remember where I lived yesterday, I embarked into the city to gather the various addresses of the numerous places I have lived in New Orleans for the past I don't know how many years. Heres what I discovered.











4 our of the 6 places I went to were destroyed and being gutted.



On my way out, I ran into this. It is a levee they have built ACROSS Airline Highway, a major artery in and out of the city. The nice military guys in the humvee told me it was going to stay there.

And just when I thought I was safe at home on the Northshore, I was attacked by this Hurricane.



I gotta get out of here.

Wee turtle.

I can only imagine the fear in your eyes as the wind whipped you around and around. I can only imagine what it felt like as the water rose and swept you away. I can only hope that the wind and the water which has displaced so many, lifted you into the arms of a child or family who can put you to good use. Maybe you are perched high on a rooftop, watching the city ebb and flow. I'll always remember our time together, wee turtle full o beer. Wee turtle full of hope.

Dear America,

I suppose we should introduce ourselves: We're South Louisiana.

We have arrived on your doorstep on short notice and we apologize for that, but we never were much for waiting around for invitations. We're not much on formalities like that.

And we might be staying around your town for a while, enrolling in your schools and looking for jobs, so we wanted to tell you a few things about us. We know you didn't ask for this and neither did we, so we're just going to have to make the best of it.

First of all, we thank you. For your money, your water, your food, your prayers, your boats and buses and the men and women of your National Guards, fire departments, hospitals and everyone else who has come to our rescue.

We're a fiercely proud and independent people, and we don't cotton much to outside interference, but we're not ashamed to accept help when we need it. And right now, we need it.

Just don't get carried away. For instance, once we get around to fishing again, don't try to tell us what kind of lures work best in your waters.

We're not going to listen. We're stubborn that way.

You probably already know that we talk funny and listen to strange music and eat things you'd probably hire an exterminator to get out of your yard.

We dance even if there's no radio. We drink at funerals. We talk too much and laugh too loud and live too large and, frankly, we're suspicious of others who don't.

But we'll try not to judge you while we're in your town.

Everybody loves their home, we know that. But we love South Louisiana with a ferocity that borders on the pathological. Sometimes we bury our dead in LSU sweatshirts.

Often we don't make sense. You may wonder why, for instance - if we could only carry one small bag of belongings with us on our journey to your state - why in God's name did we bring a pair of shrimp boots?

We can't really explain that. It is what it is.

You've probably heard that many of us stayed behind. As bad as it is, many of us cannot fathom a life outside of our border, out in that place we call Elsewhere.

The only way you could understand that is if you have been there, and so many of you have. So you realize that when you strip away all the craziness and bars and parades and music and architecture and all that hooey, really, the best thing about where we come from is us.

We are what made this place a national treasure. We're good people. And don't be afraid to ask us how to pronounce our names. It happens all the time.

When you meet us now and you look into our eyes, you will see the saddest story ever told. Our hearts are broken into a thousand pieces.

But don't pity us. We're gonna make it. We're resilient. After all, we've been rooting for the Saints for 35 years. That's got to count for something.

OK, maybe something else you should know is that we make jokes at inappropriate times.

But what the hell.

And one more thing: In our part of the country, we're used to having visitors. It's our way of life.

So when all this is over and we move back home, we will repay to you the hospitality and generosity of spirit you offer to us in this season of our despair.

That is our promise. That is our faith.

From Chris Rose, columnist for the Times Picayune.

Ok, maybe I am too slow on this technology, but every single killogger needs to download this Google Earth beta. It is satellite imaging of the ENTIRE PLANET with streets, buildings, and what not. You can drag and zoom and click all over the FREAKING EARTH! Crazy. Check it out. Trust me.

http://desktop.google.com/download/earth/index.html


P.S. Sorry Josh, this should just be a link but I think this warranted a front page post.

I have organized a hanging posse to assult Jazzfest on Saturday April 30, 2005. We intend to go early, soak up the vibe, groove to the local brass bands like the Soul Rebels and Dirty Dozen, then jump for joy when Elvis Costello plays around 5:30. The Elvis Costello show shall provide double opportunity as we will be simultaneously shunning Dave Matthews and his band of hippies who are scheduled to play across the fairgrounds at the same time.

Email me if you are going Saturday and want to meet up.

I just wanted to let everyone on Killoggs know that I totally love you guys and enjoy the reprieve your posts give me from an otherwise stressful and mundane workday!

Barf.

This post is not too short. In my underware. Wandering around my apartment.

Holy Shit. I was just told of a service in Los Vegas called the Chimp-angne-zee, which is, apparently, a service wherein a Chimp comes to your door in a white tuxedo with a bottle of champange, opens and pours the champange for you and your friends, pours a glass for him/her self, then proceeds to DRINK a glass of champange with you and your party.

Holy shit.

I need a Chimp-angne-zee.

Am I the only one who thinks that all the congressmen and women who are sporting the stupid purple ink on their fingers during the State of the Union address is retarded and bandwagon jumping in its worst form?

the fact that 22,000 people got killed this weekend by MICKEY-FREAKING TIDAL WAVES!!!!!!!????????

I know Josh, this is news, BUT MICKEY-FREAKING TIDAL WAVES DON'T DESERVE TO BE IN NEWS!!!!

TIDAL WAAAAAAAAVES!

This kind of shit scares me. Why don't you just stay in the water you greedy shark? You have to fly now too? Leave me and my precious air alone!

Dog Shit

[*dogs barking*]

[Ol Dirty Bastard]
All y'all bitches put your naps together
And all you niggaz put your dicks together, bitch

[Ol Dirty starts singing]
Hoeeeee! Yah ha heh
De, hayyyy! Ah ha he hay
De, haaaaa! Errr hah hahhhr
Haaaaaaaah He hawww, heahh

She flew in like calm breeze
Tall brown skin her weave like palm trees
I went coconuts
Dipped my Dunkin' between your Donut
Don't want it if it ain't no slut, bitch!
Fathership touch ground, like fly on soup
Don't invite me I tear the fuck down
White ones cut my toupee!
Seventh day rester, or scream play
I slump MC slay, it ain't nuttin to bust ass
Bullet him, get him fast
Bitch I don't break out, blast to the next rash
The dog piss on MC's like trees
Got meals but still grill that old good welfare cheese

[Ol Dirty sings again]
Hoeeeeee!
Yeah, hayyyy! Dedicated to all you bitch ass niggaz
De, haaaaa And you bitch ass niggarettes
Bitch! Hoeeeeee! Motherfuckers!

[RZA] Let that bitch go!

Shame on a nuh, who tried to step TUH
the Ol Dirty Bas, put my foot up your UHH
Bitch, you walk around with your bra too tight
It's alright, you still gon' get fucked tonight
Hoeeeeee!

[Method] Stankin ass hoes!

You're the type of bitch don't appreciate sheeeit
Never had sheeeit, so you won't be sheeeeit
That pussy there, couldn't satisfy a hair
on my body, treat me like a lolli and slob me down
*SLURP, SLURP* I'm Doo Doo Brown! Hehahahaha
Tossed salad, oh you in some shit now
Callin me a dog, well leave a dog alone
Cause nothin can stop me from buryin my bones
in the backyard, of someone else's house
Ol Dirt Dog, but I'm not dog out
Here comes Rover, sniffin at your ass
But pardon me bitch, as I shit on your grass
That means hoe, you been shit-ted on!
I'm not the first dog that's shitted on your lawn

[crazy drunken ass ODB singin again]

Hoeeeee! Yeah, heyyyy, de haaaaa
Hoe, ohhaowwohh!
Hoeeeee, de heyyyy
(This is dedicated to all y'all bitches)
De, haaaahhhh
Hoeeeee! Yeah, heyyyy, de haaaaa
Ahahaahaaah

Fuck y'all


R.I.P Dirt McGirt

Lets do this, fuckers.

I'm freaking out. Are you?

Discuss.