emily [email] said at 4:14 PM 02-16-2006: Well, she gives me little gifts all the time (so I would think this means she likes me), but that doesn't cover up the fact that she's a complete fuck-up.
emily [email] said at 2:54 PM 02-17-2006: She likes to call me at 5pm to have a meeting or assign me to some past-deadline task she should have handled days ago. This was especially annoying on Valentines Day and even more annoying on Wednesday but the icing on the cake was when she sent me in e-mail that started with "Can I dump this on you? I've got some deadlines to meet" followed by me seeing her leave for the day.
Yesterday I left at 4:59 and took the stairs so as to not run into her in the elevator. Today I will do the same. She is a total pain in the ass.
brandon [email] said at 8:31 PM 02-16-2006: Emily, if you're truly METAL as your shirt states, your solution needs be to prayer unto the dark lord that your boss's blood boil in her veins as she sleeps tonight, and that while she remains somewhat alive, her cats begin to gnaw upon her steamed flesh. While this is a pretty common and simple request, it's also pretty easy to botch. You could end up accidentally bestowing her with unforeseen windfalls, hardly tormenting. Therefore, I recommend hiring a ambidextrous satyr who is capable of playing two different scales in two different modes on a double-necked guitar on which the fret-boards are arranged in a V relative to the center of the body, which should be an oak and maple solid pentagram emblazoned with a stylized baphomet, to emcee the affair.
Let the metal out. Then shove it up your boss's ass.
