there's this hellacious Stench in the backyard. after the 4th day i reluctantly accepted that it was not originating from the next door neighbor's recent application of fish emulsion to her rose garden. my acceptance came only after a turkey vulture started to circle the backyard, flying in so low that it barely avoided colliding with the loquat trees. vultures are a lot bigger than you'd expect, close up.
i encouraged the dog, hoping that it might have a hidden talent for cadaver search, but she only peed on the lawn and flopped down in the shade under the patio table. I then assumed the role of cadaver dog, sniffing out the origin of the Stench, poking gingerly at the underbrush with a pair of bamboo stakes. the Stench was strongest near to the fence, coming through the gaps in the wood slats. I briefly entertained the idea that the next door neighbor murdered her husband--or perhaps other family members--and buried them among the roses. oddly, that idea was easier to accept than the concept of fish emulsion. turns out the fence in that section of the yard is doubled up: there's another fence installed just ~4" behind it, paralleling its run for 16'. within the gap lies the very puffy, very dead, and very stinky remains of a possum.
so here's my first killoggs post: how am I going to get rid of the Stench in the backyard? the fence(s) are not of a style that's easily dismantled... the remains appear to be of too unstable composition to fish out from above... i thought about covering it with quicklime, but several websites warned "quicklime is not flammable but on contact with water may generate sufficient heat to ignite surrounding materials" which would make it not-such-a-GoodThing to pour between two wooden fences. anyone have any experience w/ dead body odor control?
angele said at 8:10 PM 08-15-2001: How quickly can ants devour a mound of sugar? Perhaps if you sugarcoated it, you can trick the little insects to hurry up and eat the rest of the rotting, festering varmint. Or would that just end up in infestation?
Jeff said at 9:04 PM 08-15-2001: As odd as this sounds, maybe you can pour some clear latex enamel all over it from above. When it dries, it might create a skin that will better trap in the smell. It'll be exposed to the ground from below, so it'll continue to decompose over time. A couple of coates might be better than one, with the second adhering to the first coating better than the once-animal itself.
Ian said at 11:28 PM 08-15-2001: smell should be gone in a few days, after nature does its work. bugs. bacteria. Any chemicals you dump on it will be bad for the environment. If you can't stand to wait out the decay, call your local waste disposal/garbage men and tell them you have a bio-hazard. That's what they're there for, and they suggest (so I hear, anyway) that you not pick it up yourself, but let them take it away.
jeni said at 1:10 AM 08-16-2001: quicklime is just calcium oxide (which is made from limestone), an ingredient commonly used in the creation of cement and fertilizer. its not really an evil chemical per se. if nothing else, i'll bet the hydrangeas would really enjoy it. i'll call animal control and the garbage service tomorrow and see if they deal w/ this though
brandon [email] said at 12:29 AM 08-16-2001: All around the sidewalks of the city of chicago are dead poisoned rats. You see them mostly in the mornings. I count dozens where I live. The city posts placards decrying the little buggers and buries poison to kill them. The posters themselves, which depict rats as jagged savage, snarrelling things are reminiscent of white people
Rick & A Hard Place said at 11:45 AM 08-16-2001: "rattus norvegicus" is a marvel of nature. It can chew through almost anything, breed like nobody's business & be trained to do a lot of tricks. It cannot vomit though. If one corners it, it will fight back, sometimes leaping into the air. Rats were responsible for much of the bubonic plague that swept Europe.
shelly [email] said at 5:32 PM 08-16-2001: you should take a picture of it every day and then animate them together.
or throw a bunch of hardy wildflower seeds on it and water it every day. it is preferable if people see you watering the possum. if anyone asks what you are doings reply "watering the possum" (duh!).
begin a compost heap on top of the possum but only after having a suitable burial. it is best if you invite all of your friends who play musical instruments to play the possum's spirit (and hopefully his stink) off into the nether world. be sure to say a few words about all he contributed in life.
