I was searching for some old poem I liked as a teenager and I found this site where gentlemen pretend they're batman. It's really the best website in the world. Here's an excerpt:

"
I push Dana out of the way and take the hit to the ground. I rise to my feet.

"Stalker!" I say in my batman voice. "So you come for your trophy?"

"Yes I have Batman," The Stalker replies. He extends his pole and swats at my head. I duck quickly and flip towards Dana.

"Come on where is it?" I ask myself. I reach into my back pocket and find some gas balls. "Sorry Dana!" I whip a gas ball at her face sending her peacefully asleep to the ground.

I do a backflip and land on the roof of the new Dodge Viper GTS. (( OOC: I love cars)) "In case you haven't noticed. The Bat is not here." I playfully taunt. I bend on my knees and launch at him full speed turning a sphere into a drop kick. The Stalker bashes into a steel pole.

I take his head and bash his head against the steel pole several times. Thinking I have the advantage I take a short while to catch my breath.

The Stalker quickly counters with a roundhouse kick to my face. I am sent straight to the ground.

I carefully climb to my feet. I clumbsily reach for one of the remaining gas balls.

"

Read more of the magic here.