This weekend was a good one. I watched the Fla/LSU game. Admitted to myself and my friends that I am tempted to not vote for Kerry and dry-humped my favorite rottie.
Good: last night, I smoked up cause I don't have to worry about it no more, and played poker with not pretend money until 4:00 am.
Better: I fell asleep this morning in the most comfortable bed with a hot chick and her great dog. The dog slept on my legs. The girl slept on my arm.
Awful: Woke up this morning to go let out said dog, and as I walked past the bathroom, got an eyeful of girl's roomate squatting on the toilet, midstream. Gross man, close the door. Fuck, I close the door if I'm in an empty house. She was shocked to see me there and shocked at what I had seen. Girls, do you always wear the thousand yard stare when you pee? She looked like Shirley McClane circa "Out on a Limb" but unlike Shirley, she followed the yellow astral thread down into the sewers
Good fodder for Woody: bonded over a cure song with this girl that, I thought was a bitch, she is, but now we're friends
Good shit today: Took A. and J. thrift shopping. Bought a glow in the dark skull and glow in the dark skeleton gloves at Here Today Gone Tomorrow. Skeleton Gloves are now driving gloves. I wore them for the rest of today. Typing with them now. Used the skeleton gloves to Shoplifted Pokemon: blah blah blah for Gameboy from Family Thrift. Got a malted at Baskin Robbins. Found a suit that is, including vest, a duplicate of Napoleon's from that movie. Did not find sushi pattern fabric for planned matching sushi pajamas with roommate. Did find adorable Baby Duck patterned fabric
Good still: Finalized Halloween costume: purchased new padre gown, padre hat, crucifix - pretty standard.
Better: Purchased leather biker's hat a'la "The Blue Oyster" - Understated yet not groundbreaking. Stitching bag to hold candy that displays the message "Suffer the Little Children to Cum Unto Me".
What makes the costume happen for me: purchased over-sized binky, like the ones frequently seen worn by dolts in the late 90s. Purchased costume bondage S&M Cod piece which will give the impression of a large bulging erection beneath the priesty gown. Growing Mustache. My hostility is not toward Catholicism, it's toward corruption. Speaking of which, there's a popular bumper-sticker down here - "I'm thankful for the thousands of good priests!" Seriously, Fuck those people. That kind of thinking, man.
Do they still have the Carlotta Street Paty? Would anyone like to make plans to go out to Carlotta Street? I have other parties to go to, but, perhaps plans are not what I mean. Is anyone going out there? One party I'm attending will involve a campy Christian-Satanic Ritual, and a baby pool filled with blood
Giving Yul Brynner a High-Five is my new favorite euphemism for jerking off. Because you have to think about it for a second. By the way, Yul died on this date in 1985
Is anyone going to VoodooFest in Nola? Would anyone be willing to put up two aging smartasses that weekend?
Bad: Last night, around 2, I experienced what I can only hope to describe as a Charley-Horse of the Ass. The muscle spasm hurt so badly, that for a moment, I was afraid in my drunkenness, that I had sat on broken glass. The pain was mostly centered on the outside right side of my right buttock, just below the hip and right below the tattoo. In a way, whatever screwed up thing that was happening to my ass muscle fibers, was also happening to the imaginary ass muscle fibers of the lady who graces my ass with her misshapen outline.
Almost forgot about this one: Last night I dreamt that I met Ericanm, only she wasn't Ericanm, she was some horse-faced chick with glasses and she was with a guy named Jit who smelled like Patchouli and twitched a lot. At first, I saw her from across the room.
Then, I was bathing in a fountain in the middle of Cortana Mall and attempting to convince some old friend that she should have my baby, when Erica came up and introduced herself. She was embarrassed because everyone was naked. Also, she had no tattoos. Then we were driving in a car toward Chicago, and she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek, and said something like: "I'm horny." and then started laughing. I blushed and then Lucy woke me up to go outside.
Anyway, that was my dream about Ericanm, a small, yet bright part of this weekend
brandon [email] said at 8:06 PM 10-27-2004: Thanks, some girl. The last Carlotta street that many of us old folks went to was the infamous, 2000 Carlotta which nearly ended in a riot because of overzealous cops and certain organizers, who shall go nameless, who forgot to get the correct permits, or so the story went. Anyway, the year after that there was none. Although there was a weaker version held on Geranium, I think? And then I just stopped caring.
Look for me, I'll be the pedophile priest with the blood-stained, underoos hankerchief, the leather biker's hat, and a bag of candy for children.
