my mother can be hysterically candid sometimes. and when she lets down her gaurd around me and says shit that i usually can handle, it makes me believe that this is the only reason that i havent killed her yet. take today, as she dropped me off at the train station after dinner. we were talking about how she needed my help moving my sister into college tomorrow.

her: i cant carry all of those boxes down the stairs!
me: yeah, but cara can, she's thick.
her: ohhh i know! you know, she poops like a trucker now
me: what?
her: yeah, she does it in my bathroom, AND THEN DOESNT FLUSH! it makes me so mad!
me: so its cara who who leaves turds everywhere, i thought that was so weird . . .
her: no, its your sister, i have to bring her into the bathroom and show her, and then make her flush. she just says"mom, i had to shit". i hate that language.
me: ok.

i also walked in on her and her younger sister talking about buying condoms for use at the beach. my uncle steve did not want to have to run into cvs in front of grandma and could my mom loan her some. moms was all like "im out! hee hee!"
im not sure of why i had to share this.