This, despite the cockroaches, despite the crazy-ass thundestorms, the 55 mph winds, the roof damage, the leak in my closet, the 90+ degree temperatures, is my favorite time of the year.
Because women are beautiful. And they are especially beautiful now. In the sauna-like humidity, cats lose their winter coats, flowers, bloom and fruit ripens, and women, women put on their summer tits.
Sweet bosoms.
Alas, I'm a little too old, now. I love, but love looks elsewhere. Still. I am surrounded by the bosomy reminder that bosoms, tits, sweet, heavy, fragrant, perfumed, heaving, perky, ahem, that life is good and worth living.
Maybe at the beach, I'll curl up with a copy of Time Enough for Love
brandon [email] said at 8:04 PM 05-15-2008: If only I could bear out the supplications
So that you might bare to me
Come, let me stretch out your sails like a beitass makes stiff the sails
Let us retire to the forecastle of you
Before I orient my flinders bar
Into your mast-trunk. And claw at your rigging until
Like a wayward vessel smashes her bow
Against a jagged, hard, rocky seashore
Rending herself in the repetitive joy
Without a crew, rudderless
Unfastened, free, jiggly, mastastique.
brandon [email] said at 10:07 PM 05-15-2008: In Louisiana we age at a faster rate. Plus, I'm somebody's picture of Dorian Gray. Plus, I've done some truly vile and evil things that have aged my mind. I've become a cynical, suspicious, hateful thing. Plus, I'm just kind of creepy and a loser. Plus, the ladies, they don't seem to respond to my painstaking verse about their tits. Plus, I'm basically a hermit. Oh, I score. I rut. I finagle. I womanize. But my heart's not in those target's anymore. It's all rote. It's all familiar territory. I'm the postman delivering my route. I haven't been thrown off balance in a long time. I miss obsession, the ability of another to move something inside of me. Now, I've become a philatelist of a kind, delighting only in ticing off the the next specimen in a series.
I desire the youth that is beyond me. I desire the wonder that I extinguished within my own yearning breast. I desire mammalries and calves firm like cantalopes - resonate to thump - smooth like stretched out testicles, like when you stretch them out and shine a light through them to learn about the circulatory system. Instead, I find that when I reach to touch them, they feel rough like avocadoes and give like sodden dry wall, like. I am the King Midas of tits.
I wonder, should I wear my trousers rolled? Should I eat a peach (yes please) I hear the mermaids, burdened with their mermaid tits, singing each to each, and performing ritualistic acts of mermaid lesbianism to titulate the mermen, but, I do not think that they'll sing to me.
I mean, that's all. It's summer. The women have gotten some sun, the clothes are skimpier. I want to tell them, I want to tell them all how I feel, about their chests, and how their chests make me feel, and what we should do about it, together, But instead, I write here.
That's all. Maybe if I had some bowstaff skills, and lived in more urban place I'd be having a better time, romantically. But as it is, I feel that by the time I'm done and elsewhere, I really will be at that age, where check-books are scrutinized before the legs are unlocked.
brad [email] said at 8:58 PM 05-15-2008: Seriously, you're not too old. I'd say women, even and maybe especially younger women, are much more receptive to me now than when I was 25 or 26. I think that has mainly to do with the fact that I'm no longer desperate or near as nervous in the presence of attractive women. The older I get, the more familiar I become with women, the less I'm impressed by women in general, i.e., I'm more selective with who I decide to hook up with. It used to be me always trying to win a girl's attention, and now, I'd say it's more the opposite. Also, bear in mind that women over the age of 30 are in their sexual prime, so if you're lucky enough to find one who hasn't already settled down...
brandon [email] said at 11:50 AM 06-15-2008: Flirty Fishing. Over the years, we've probably collected more Flirty Fishing links on this website than anywhere else on the web.