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Threaded Responses [ bottom ]
M [ url ]
said at 8:45 AM 10-25-2006:
It's just as a good a reason as love. |
 | ed [email] said at 9:06 AM 10-25-2006:
If you truly believe that, I am very sad for you. |
 | rick [email] said at 12:34 PM 10-25-2006:
Maybe she is old school; until the Nineteenth Century, marrying for love was a novel concept within Western Civilization. |
M said at 1:23 PM 10-25-2006:
I don't believe it in for myself but that's easy for me to say since I have health insurance. If I were on the flip side, I would never marry someone for health insurance either. That's just me.
I understand there are many non-romantic but practical reasons to get married. You and I don't know how desperate a particular situation may be that drives a person to do particular things other people would never do. We just don't know because we're not in that position.
There has to be love involved in a marriage of convenience such as the one Kara talks about--just not the kind one would expect to find in most marriage partnerships. I have certain friends I would totally get married to if they really needed the insurance because I do love them and want to make sure they don't suffer (and there can be a lot of suffering with high medical bills). These are the friends who would not screw me over, too. There are friends I certainly would never marry to help out in any way because I know their shady character. |
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| ed [email] said at 9:10 AM 10-25-2006:
I don't think it's the best reason, but it's not an invalid reason, either. It would have to be someone you trust - a LOT - not to screw over your credit, go psycho on your ass, etc. |
 | milky [email] said at 9:30 AM 10-25-2006:
go psycho on you ass...
I was marrying my last fiancee for health insurance and that's just what happened. She was so psycho, she wanted me to be her 'estranged husband' so I'd have health insurance. |
 | anthony [email] said at 10:06 AM 10-25-2006:
Yeah, this seems like a really bad idea. |
 | craig [email] said at 11:59 AM 10-25-2006:
I can't believe that you would attempt to cheapen the sacred vows of marriage in such a way. Marriage is love. |
 | mary [email] said at 12:00 PM 10-25-2006:
Bad idea. I'm sure our lawyer buddy could break this down for you better than I could, but it's not like you can only sign up for the "health insurance" part of the marriage deal. There's also that pesky joint property stuff and inheritance issues. This person would be your next of kin. |
 | kara [email] said at 12:49 PM 10-25-2006:
yeah see thats the stuff I need to know about.
bummer. |
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| rick [email] said at 12:36 PM 10-25-2006:
I have read about people marrying members of the military about to be shipped overseas for the military health coverage (which is pretty extensive).Of course, that is fraud and may be sanctioned with prisontime but some people like to live dangerously, I would guess. |
Oona said at 1:18 PM 10-25-2006:
What Mary said...and one doesn't realize how binding a marriage contract is until one is, er, stuck in one. Suppose he/she were to loose or change jobs and the health insurance was lost, then what? If one or the other is sued, arrested, in an accident, in a coma, lost at sea, picked up by INS, audited by IRS, wanted by the mob, or a million other things I can't think of, the spouse (even if you aren't living together) is held responsible for LOTS of stuff and not just financially. But that too. If one dies the other gets to pay off their debt and have the footwork of dissolving their accounts. It doesn't matter what the marriage is about, the contract binds and it's public record. |
 | marcia [email] said at 2:45 PM 10-25-2006:
Oops, sorry, Oona, this wasn't in response to your post. |
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| marcia [email] said at 2:45 PM 10-25-2006:
I was married for 5 years for this sole purpose. He had my health insurance for all of those 5 years.
Friends of mine freaked out and lectured me about the dangers and how I was going to ultimately regret my decision.
Well, 5 years later, I don't regret my decision.
And our divorce took a whole of 20 minutes in a courtroom.
I think he and I were relatively lucky that nothing "went wrong"--like one of us died, etc. He's now happily married to the girl he was with for 4 out of the 5 years we were married.
I, personally, find nothing wrong with marrying someone for financial purposes. I think there is a great danger in the idea of marriage in general--mixing law and romantic ideas of love (similar to my feelings that sex and money should probably also not be intertwined).
I was going to marry my boyfriend so he could get his greencard, but have since decided to wait on that, primarily because, well, of our involvment, and that could get complicated on many different levels.
Also: if you're sleeping with this guy or are in any way involved with him, DO NOT GET MARRIED. |
 | brandonA [email] said at 3:50 PM 10-25-2006:
only if you trust them. you could get fucked over otherwise.
OR has domestic partnership laws, so you only have to live together to share insurance here. I get the added bonus of snidely calling my girlfriend 'DP'. |
 | julie [email] said at 8:28 PM 10-25-2006:
If he has debts, they will become YOUR debts. Or, if he incurs debts while you're married, they become yours as well. |
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| mary [email] said at 9:31 AM 10-26-2006:
Well, I'm not sure this is exactly the case, though she will certainly be pursued for his debts taken on during marriage if he defaults. Your assets and debts from pre-marriage are your own, is my understanding.
But,let's say Kara gets her $50K book deal while she's married to this person. Half your income from it is his, unless you signed a prenup. You're really banking on this person not being an ass. |
 | zack [email] said at 9:39 PM 10-25-2006:
Come marry me Kara.
I just got health insurance!
Plus, I am totally in debt from school!
Plus, I totally don't believe in marriage! |
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| kara [email] said at 11:24 AM 10-26-2006:
I have health insurance!
I am in debt too, I don't believe in marraige either... but I do believe in health care for all |
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| zack [email] said at 1:13 PM 10-26-2006:
oh yeah..... Well, Don't marry this dude. I heard he's a jerk. |
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| zack [email] said at 2:03 PM 10-26-2006:
actually, I hadn't heard anything about this dude.. I just hadn't had enough coffee yet to think of something funny to say. |
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| marcia [email] said at 12:46 PM 10-26-2006:
I think if it truly, simply is for health insurance, and you both live your lives completely separately, I don't find it to be a big deal. My ex husband stayed out of my business, I stayed out of his. His debts were his debts, mine were mine. My income was my income, his was his. Although there are a great many human beings that are asses, a few of my friends have gotten married for insurance and other financial perks, and all have been resolved maturely and easily. And lawyers were never involved. Btu that doesn't mean you couldn't get seriously fucked over by this gut. I also, naively, believe that most people are good people and they won't try to screw you over when you take a risk and help them out just because you want to. I would marry someone again to give them my health insurance.
Also, how long do you want this guy to be on your health insurance? How mature is he? Etc. etc.
The only thing I was surprised about when it comes to being married was that if I were to die, my life insurance went automatically to my husband, that is, I had to put his down as the recipient, I had no choice in that matter. He actually had to agree to it and sign papers for my life insurance to go to my parents, not him. | |
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