brandon [email] said at 2:56 AM 05-23-2005: She loved it; he loved doing it; they're in love.
Some women need to be slapped from time to time, if not held down and practically raped for their own (and the good of others) Every woman should spend a few moments a day locked up with a government-issued rape machine: it gets the bitch out.
brandon [email] said at 7:52 PM 06-03-2006: Wow. Sometimes I impress even myself, Like a squirrel, hoarding nuts for the long winter of my dotage, since, you know, squirrels are often impressed by their own hoarding technique.
Every girl I've ever loved
Has wanted to be hit
Every girl I've ever loved
Has wanted to be hit
Every girl I've ever loved
Has wanted to be hit
Every girl I've ever loved
Left me, 'cause I wouldn't do it.
Got some advice for you friend
bruise 'em, you'll never lose 'em
bruise 'em, you'll never lose 'em
alright now
Seems my sensitive touch
Can be given by, any old schmuck
Alright now
cecil [email] said at 4:28 AM 05-23-2005: He hit me, and it felt like a kiss.
He hit me, but it didn't hurt me.
He couldn't stand to hear me say,
that I had been with someone new.
And when I told him I had been untrue -
he hit me, and it felt like a kiss.
He hit me, and I knew he loved me,
cos if he didn't care for me,
I could of never made him mad,
and he hit me, and I was glad.
-Carol King (The Crystals version is amazing, the Hole version is stupid)
angele [email] said at 8:09 AM 05-23-2005: I didn't know that there were other versions than the amazing Crystals version. It's not so much the words as it is the doo wop style -- or whatever the "Going to the Chapel" style is. Without hearing it, I agree that the Hole version is stupid.
kara [email] said at 10:02 AM 05-23-2005: It's a "girl group" song.. There's a few songs with lyrics like this, I wish they were gathered on a compilation.
josh [email] said at 8:41 AM 05-23-2005: yesterday i bought a vhs tape at a thrift store... it had two things one it, 1) an interview with someone's parents a la that "stories" thing that npr is doing now... ANNNNDD 2) a homemade music video comprised of the "villager rape scenes" from several vietnam movies, set to "stand by your man".
josh [email] said at 9:02 AM 05-23-2005: this tape had "learning to speak english 12:00" and "stand by your man 4:00" and the creators name and address written on it in gold marker - how could i NOT buy it?
julie [email] said at 12:35 PM 05-23-2005: Because it's a VHS. I thought you were all about the new technology. You don't even have a (cassette) tape player!
josh [email] said at 12:43 PM 05-23-2005: I guess you missed my post about how I'm making a found footage DVD with clips from all the weird shit I've collected over the years.
zack [email] said at 12:07 PM 05-23-2005: yeah I dunno, it was the image for some meme thing some girl did on LJ.. She was "the bitchslap", apparently.
kiche [email] said at 12:27 PM 05-23-2005: oh come now, where is that fun loving zack that would come on here and give us pointers on the proper manner in which to beat women?
zack [email] said at 12:42 PM 05-23-2005: I never did that- I'm all about consentual horseplay, though you could probably look at the picture above as the proper manner in which to beat women, as the lady in question looks on the verge of orgasm.
kiche [email] said at 1:42 PM 05-23-2005: that dude looks on the verge of orgasm too. we have a phallic symbol and a vaginal symbol within the characters physical bodies in the above picture.
kara [email] said at 4:33 PM 05-23-2005: Be patient - Don't hit a bitch until she says/does something to deserve it. And she will.
If she's an uppity woman with some kind of day job, you should avoid giving her a black eye.
Never ever cause permanent scars.
Make sure to convince her that you understand and appreciate her in ways that her meddling friends never can.
Once she starts crying, stop hitting and start consoling her.
brandon [email] said at 8:31 PM 06-03-2006: I think maybe I stopped reading this thread originally, because this is brilliant and deserve's praise. If anyone wants to see a great, I mean, just classic on-screen beat down (to the point that the character, Conchita, pisses her pants (mention is made of this fact) enjoy Luis Bunuel's "Cet obscur objet du désir." There are worse ways to spend a few hours.
