Josh, I know that you're all busy making stickers, massaging the locust with the hidden hand in the basement of the dirtfarm and whatnot.
But hows about one more club for Killoggs.
The Killoggs Forum
It can be anonymous like Ruthless. And filled with nothing but dirty, naughty stories about like, having rough sex in the back of tahoe and elsewhere and waking up with a welt on the your penis where the friction wore away the thin, vulnerable skin and how every time you itch it, you get an erection, and every time you get an erection, the pain comes, and you lose the erection.
I mean, seriously, we're all having really good sex, sex that you want to brag about, sex with farts in the middle that you're growing Midas's ears you want to say something so badly, sex where you made both of the girls bleed, and they liked it, sex with some chick so unkempt that it was like you were performing a trepanation on Guy Sebastian with your jonx. People want to write about this, but they have no where to go. Killoggs.com/dating is pretty much bunk, I mean it's all [read this in sort of mewling voice] "What should I do if some boy likes me..." crap. Or Jake striking out with zaftig... um, I mean, Jake striking up conversations on Zaftigwafta, a prestigious German airliners.
I want to read and write stories about the sick twisted shit we all do to members of the opposite sex. Call me perverted, but I think the time is come to move "I never thought it could happen to me stories," out of the ghetto of the journals, from the main-page where people always bitch about "NSFW" and into a privileged zone where semi-anonymous adults can discuss swapping spit, semen and HIV in unseemly, cliched and inappropriate ways. C'mon Josh, KILLOGGS FORUMS. DOOO EEEEET.
dave. said at 11:11 AM 12-11-2004: in between shots of sweet, sweet methamphetamine i decided to reply. feel honored. and like, isn't this whole "site" what you're talking about? maybe i'm just cracked out.
craig [email] said at 1:09 PM 12-11-2004: That's just what we need, another forum to get lost in reading the posts of a bunch of question heads that I have no idea who they are.
brandon [email] said at 1:41 PM 12-11-2004: A but the dating service has failed in the alpha quadrant. Plus, people are reticent about queefs and anal sex in there - yet we know that this is happening - constantly - to killoggers while they're busy stuffing Yul Brynner down the meat-curing spider-hole.
To get people to write about the blood, the shit, the lacerations, chips, dips, chains, whips we must do this. We MUST.
rick [email] said at 1:45 PM 12-11-2004: Begin discourse in the DS about whatever you are into. If I have something to say about it, I will go ahead and toss more than my $0.02.
brandon [email] said at 3:13 PM 12-11-2004: What kind of a monster are you if you're not entertained by Segal's movies. Plus, he's the reincarnated Llama of Doha, doesn't that mean anything to you?
brandon [email] said at 3:27 PM 12-11-2004: Richard Gere's gerbil is a MYTH. It never happened. I can't believe that you'd repeat such a vicious lie. Also, Rod Stewart never had a liter of cum pumped from his stomach. And Milton Berle's penis actually didn't have tiny lungs and a heart attached.
