I just spent the last 20 minutes speaking to a crying woman in Finland. She is the wife of the Russian woman who is currently my boss's girlfriend, E. Somehow my boss, G, met E in Russia while he was on a business trip; he went to Russia about 5 times over the last year. He finally got her and her son to come here to live, he's supporting them. He is separated but not yet divorced from his wife, with whom he has a daughter. He does not want his wife to know he is living in an apartment with his Russian girlfriend and her son; I think that will be to her financial advantage in a divorce. His 6-year-old daughter does know about E and her new step-brother-friend and G tells her not to tell her mom about them.
And so, once in a while this woman in Finland, N, calls the office to speak to E. I've been annoyed with her calls in the past. If E wants to talk to her, can't she reach her on her own phone? Today she asked to speak to E or G, but I tell her neither of them are in the office now. She calls back every 15 minutes and I finally tell her I'm really not sure when they will be back. She breaks down. She is telling me how she and E are married and yet E will not give her a divorce; that E is leading a double-life. I just listen to her talk about her life in chaos, I tell her I sympathize and understand, that I hope things work out for her. She asks me if I think E is happy and I tell her I really don't know. She asks me a lot of questions that are really none of my business and I tell her so. Really, I would like to tell her what I think, that my boss is a selfish lying cheating bastard, but I don't. I just listen to her and I can tell she appreciates it. She calms down and says not to tell them she called and she thinks she'll be able to sleep now.
In the mean time I believe G and E are out having lunch, or sex, during work hours; and he is fooling himself into believing he is beginning this new wonderful life with his new true love, while he steps on the lives of his wife, E's wife, and 2 young children who find themselves in the middle of it all.
Not to mention how in the middle of it I feel. And if my boss didn't go to Russia 5 times and wasn't trying to support an immigrant family, he'd probably be able to give me a raise.
brandonr said at 4:15 PM 03-15-2004: In Russia, you don't marry the woman, the woman marry a woman... or something... Russian women can marry Russian other women? That's hot.
cecil [email] said at 4:51 PM 03-15-2004: Technically it's a Russian woman and Finnish woman. I suppose you could say they were RUSSIAN TO THE FINNISH!
brandon [email] said at 5:02 PM 03-15-2004: If I were you, I would formulate a request for a raise, DENMARK off the days until the most opportune time to bring it up.
brandon [email] said at 5:05 PM 03-15-2004: Here are some of the following values in which your boss takes little STOCK: HOLM, Family, Marriage Vows, etc.
Woody said at 5:07 PM 03-15-2004: Does G know E and N are married? If not, you might be able to blackmail yourself some E-N-C 3-way.
Personally, I really hate knowing shit like this. There is a husband and wife who work here (actually there are several) and the husband worked with a friend of mine in South America. The husband frequented hookers every weekend. Of course, the wife is a casual friend of mine and they have a cute little family. I so hate knowing shit like that.
Woody said at 3:20 PM 03-16-2004: You are kidding, no? I've never tried 'em, but for example, if you ever go to Rio you have to check out the Help Disco. Brazilian women are among the most beautiful in the world, and prostitution is a pretty accepted profession there, so it's competitive and a lot of gorgeous women are "on the program". And hairy legs? Dude, there is a waxing procedure named after them. They want Gringo dollars so I'm sure they're smooth.
Woody said at 12:01 PM 03-17-2004: Out of curiousity, where does everybody line up on this issue? I can't see myself ever using their services, but I totally support their legal existence. I've known feminists on both sides, so I'm interested to know what the broads around here think.
Woody said at 12:45 PM 03-17-2004: I found it this time. 95% guns, 5% hoes. That is a shitty ratio. You people are too obsessed with guns, not obsessed enough with sex.
cecil [email] said at 5:13 PM 03-15-2004: I think G knows. Once he told me he never wants to speak to that woman, N. What the hell am I supposed to tell her?
cecil [email] said at 4:47 PM 03-15-2004: I have thought of it. Because I'm actually pretty friendly with my boss's wife! If he gives me any shit I could ruin his life. I think I just prefer to feel the power rather than use it.
milky [email] said at 4:49 PM 03-15-2004: *shrugs*
You know it worked for me. This cat thinks he's competent enough to juggle women, in fact he is right now and it takes money to do that. Say to the boss, look, for this amount of money, I can "assure" you no one will know. Consider it a favor I'll work really hard at...etc.
shelly [email] said at 4:39 PM 03-15-2004: Bad Boss put me on the phone to lie to his Undisciplined Child and tell Undiciplined Child that i as "the boss" would not allow mr. real Bad Boss to bring Undisciplined Child to work today, because daddy(Bad Boss) had too much work to do for me, "the boss"
Woody said at 5:03 PM 03-15-2004: (Jian on lead)
He can't stand a loss
He's always cross
His name is Ross... my [boss]
I love my boss
I love my boss
He isn't full of fluff and gloss
He gives me work and many chores to do
My model, like Ben Cartwright to Hoss
And though he pays me minimum wage
It's all I deserve at this stage
Some union hack said I should ask for more
I answered with suitable rage
I love my boss
I love my boss
I love my boss
I love my boss
One day I came to work too late
I'd had a Früvous luncheon date
My boss he summoned me to speak with him
I sweated, awaiting my fate
He said "you're done!"
He chased me two blocks with a gun
But my dear boss let me apologize
In hindsite, there wasn't a gun.
(Mike)
He's going out now with my sister
They go real heavy on the sauce
I'd like to tell him watch out mister
But he's the boss
My friends they say that I am clinging
Ask why I'm carrying this cross
Who knows what club-med will be bringing
From dear old boss
(spoken by Jian)
Examples
(All)
Bosses through the ages prove
They're the ones who make it move
Bewitched would have an empty plate
If it weren't for Larry Tate
Clark Kent reached the highest height
With the help of Perry White
And if we may be retrograde
Speak the name Reuben Kincaid
(Jian)
Now the other workers all say "Wow!"
When I roll over and I shake a paw
My boss is my brother-in-law
(All)
I love my boss
I love my boss
I love my boss
I love my boss
pokey [email] said at 10:09 PM 03-15-2004: There's this lady at work who is really pompous and always talks about her wonderful model daughter, and if you speak of any hardships you are experiencing, of her handicapped daughter, in what seems like an attempt to seem stronger than you. Through an emailaing mishap, where she sent me more files than she intended, I discovered SHE is the reason her daughter is handicapped, and the reasons behind her irritating personality were suddenly clear.
pokey [email] said at 10:39 PM 03-15-2004: I don't even know where to begin. I just know that it is fascinating, to me, to know the secret of her psyche.
pokey [email] said at 2:13 PM 03-16-2004: She is writing books. Apparently she emailed me some rough drafts of various chapters in said books, because they were in the same folder as some work documents.
pokey [email] said at 3:57 PM 03-16-2004: No way. Then she would know for sure that I was talking about her. She would DEFINITELY recognize my head.
A friend of mine suggested that I blackmail her, but that is a work environment I don't want to deal with. Something sinister inside of me, though, kind of wants to allude to it vaguely, just to watch her squirm, but I really don't want to be responsible for some poor woman's nervous breakdown.
pokey [email] said at 4:31 PM 03-16-2004: Yeah. It must be hell to be dealing with. I guess it's been like 20 years, but 20 years isn't undoing the damage.
